Do find it easier to abstain than moderate?

I had wls 3 years ago, and in my life no matter the issue it is easier for me to abstain than to moderate.

Doesn't matter if it is a bad habit,  food, or whatever.  So I find it easier to actually  to not eat than to eat in moderation!   This is a struggle I have, do you have this struggle?  Do you do well until you get a taste of something you want then your will power melts away?  But this is not a healthy mentality, at least for me because unlike alcohol we have to eat. So the struggle for me is akin to asking an alcoholic to just have a sip and stop. Three or four times a day. 

Please share with me your thoughts on this.  I am looking for how you have dealt with this issue not for direction to other groups or counseling which I already have. :)  Thanks JB

I've gone to Overeater's Anonymous for years and what I've learned is that alcoholics still have to drink...they just have to abstain from alcohol.  Compulsive overeaters have to eat...but it can be tough to identify those trigger and binge foods that incite them to overeat compulsively.  It's just a bit harder to identify the stuff we must abstain from.  

For me, the number one offender is anything with sugar in it:  candy, cookies, cakes, donuts, pastries, etc. One is too many and a hundred will never be enough.  I'm sure you can relate! :-)  The next big trigger is white flour ie. dinner rolls, bread, pasta.  

Believe me, eating a bowl of vegetables doesn't make me want to keep eating.  Eating a chicken breast doesn't give me cravings for more and more chicken.  My inability to moderate is tied to very specific foods, tastes and textures.  I know some people who can handle sugar just fine -- but it's salty and/or crunch foods that get to them.  

Figure out your big triggers and binge foods (not necessarily the same thing) and remove them from your life.  

This.

I cannot moderate certain foods.  Fortunately this isn't my first rodeo and I know what foods I have to avoid with no doubt: sugar and gluten products.  Those are like alcohol to me.  And I am an alcoholic as well.  There is no sip of wine at dinner and there is not half slice of toast at breakfast.  If I start eating those things I will continue until I am sick and keep going.

Case in point.  With my first WLS I figured out that eating refined carbs and white flour and sugar made my intestinal issues much worse then they already were.  So, did I avoid them or thy to eat them in "moderation"?  No, I couldn't.  The addiction was alive and well and the more I ate the more I wanted.  It didn't matter that I spent half my day in bathrooms or that I was so bloated that I couldn't breath or that I had offensive gas.  A normal person might connect those things and think to himself "Maybe I should lay off those things".  But not me.  I was willing to pay the price as long as I could eat what I wanted.

Today I don't way to pay that price.  It is too high and as long as I don't try to eat those things in "moderation" I have no desire to eat them at all.  Every failed weight loss attempt in my life, and believe me there were many, ended with the thought, "I have been doing so good.  Surely I can have a (cookie, cake, cheeseburger, whatever) every once in a while.  Before you knew it I was passed out on my bed surrounded by McDonald's bags and Little Debbie wrappers, swearing I would never do t hat again.  Until the next time.

We are soul sisters, LadyTazz - you're singing my song 

Wow, you have summed this up perfectly. This is exactly how I feel. 

There are some foods I have a very hard time eating in moderation.  For instance, I no longer ever buy Cheezits because I cannot eat just one serving.  I eat half a box.  In one day.

But I don't do that with all foods.  I can eat most foods in moderation.  So I keep my house stocked with foods I can eat in reasonable amounts and do not buy those I can't stop eating.

Cheezits are a trigger for me too; just can't keep them in the house!

Jonda

Well I know that breakfast, lunch, and dinner I am usually fine.  My triggers are also sparked by stress and relaxation times.  Growing up meant coming in from the fields and sitting in front TV with a bag of chips, etc.  When I think rest that is the first image that comes to mind.  SO in the daytime not a problem usually- but at night it's like I become a ravenous zombie:  " ugggghh garlic toastzzzzz uggghhhhhhh"

JB

I am trying to detox from chocolate as we speak. I have done great without having chocolate for 7-8 months then at Valentine’s Day we had some in the house and that’s when it started, and then with Eater candy it was tough. So I asked my hubby to hide all the candy out in the garage, aka man cave. Just because I can’t handle it doesn’t mean they should do without. So I have decided to abstain from chocolate candy and tortilla chips with salsa, also another trigger food.

For people who do not understand our problems, they don't get how destructive a single hershey's kiss can be.