Commitment to WLS: What makes this different from the past?

Hi, I'm pretty new here.  I have had a consult with a surgeon and had lab work done.  Other appointments have been scheduled for me to meet with Nutritionist, have a sleep study, get an EKG, etc.

I'm truly searching inside myself wondering why I would think I would be more successful after WLS than other attempts I have made with weight loss. 

I have told a few people about my plans for the VSG.  There is a woman where I work, who had RNY 4 years ago.  She looks great, feels great, and is very supportive.  However, there are other well meaning people *****mind me that this takes a great deal of discipline and major life changes.  They point out people they know who have had this done and gained all their weight back in six or seven years.  Why, they say, would you put yourself through all of this pain and deprivation, only to feel good about yourself for a few years?  

I can't imagine the humiliation and pain of losing and regaining a significant amount of weight in front of people at my workplace.  I don't mean to have a negative attitude.  I was feeling pretty good about this decision beforehand.  I felt I was looking at this realistically, not as a cure all.  Now, I'm very unsure.

Any thoughts?

If you're serious about embracing the lifestyle changes that begin the moment you wake up in the recovery room, you'll be a successful as you want to be. I decided that it didn't matter what other people thought of my decision, and really it's none of their business if I lose another 100lbs or gain 100lbs back. It's YOUR health, YOUR life, YOUR choice. Take this time before surgery to make sure that this is the right decision to make for YOU, and do your best to ignore the rest.

I made a decision that if I was going to do this, I had to make it my job. I go to support groups, I come here almost daily... I am trying to stay focused. I was frustrated before because I would 'do the right thing' and not see significant results. Now when 'I do the right thing' it shows. I now also have hope I can keep it off...

WLS is the easy part.  Staying focused, staying on plan and determination are what keep the weight off when the newness has worn off.  It is hard, but so was living my life obese.  In fact living as an obese adult was the hardest thing I've done.  I think you have to just decide it's what you want, and just do it.  Every single day.  No one else should factor into the equation.  

You may or may not regain all your weight after surgery.  That's really up to you.  You'll have a great tool and skills to keep it off but only you are responsible for keeping it off, making it a priority and not slipping into the old habits that got you fat in the first place. All of that is my opinion of course based on my 9 years of WLS experience both failed and revised.  I truly believe that it is up to me this time around. Stay positive and stay the course.  You can do it!

Losing weight for the first year or so after surgery is completely different than any other time in your life. It gives you the chance for a new start. A do-over. 

After that, it's up to you to do the work to maintain your loss. It gets harder, no question. Many people slip a little. Some slip a lot. But even those people still weigh a lot less than if they had continued to gain all those years. And they're healthier.

What if I gain a lot of weight back in six or seven years? Why would I go through pain and deprivation to only feel good for a few years? Ask a cancer patient if there were a surgery as simple as WLS, that would rid them of their disease for 6 or 7 years, and maybe permanently, would they do it? I'm sure they would.

Oh my goodness, your post made me cry.  It helped to shift my focus and reprioritize my goals.  You really understood what was underneath it all.  Thank you so much.

There are always going to be a few Negative Nancies. I could get in a fatal car accident, fall off a cliff, or spontaneously combust. It doesn't mean I will.

i am not going to pretend to be an expert on the science behind why RNY or VSG work. But my doctor said the surgeries actually disrupt the hormonal signalling from your stomach to your brain. And, with a smaller stomach you will feel full. You won't be able to eat 5000 calories a day. 

Some regain because they don't deal with the head stuff. Understand what triggers make you eat so you can learn other coping mechanisms.

It's also pretty common to have doubts. I posted something similar a few weeks ago. I go through periods where I am upbeat and totally positive about this and others where I think I've lost my mind. Having failed so many times before, I can't help but think this may be another failure. But someone my size gas a 5% chance if maintaining significant weight loss through diet and exercise alone whereas someone my size has a Much higher chance of sustainable success with WLS. Insurance companies pay for WLS because it works. They usually don't pay for diet programs because they're unlikely to work.

You're right about dealing with the head stuff and triggers.  That makes a lot of sense.  I think the fears I posted are head stuff, too.  You are also right about trying to diet (again!) has a much smaller success rate.

For practical reasons, I need to remember that it's my health that I'm dealing with and I want to give myself a fighting chance. 

Exactly. I have been committed to this decision since January of this year. I told my brother about my decision a few months ago and he is against it (mainly because he has a strong holistic/natural viewpoint and doesn't believe in taking antibiotics let alone altering your anatomy). He really made me doubt myself. But then I pulled my head out of my bum and told myself this is MY body and MY decision. No one has to live with the consequences of my choices but me. 

But yeah--I think the head stuff is the big thing. Surgery will give us the tools to succeed but without altering our behavior and thought process we can screw this up.

For me sticking to a low calorie lifestyle is much easier when I can only eat a small amount of food at one time and when I am never hungry.