Random Stress X Post
I got my date for my hernia surgery. It is April 15th, 2 weeks from today. It is only an overnight stay so I am sure it will be fine. I swore after my last surgery that I would never have surgery again. I had such a hard time when I first woke up. I won't go into details but I was afraid after that surgery that I wouldn't get better. It was my fault because I smoked at the time and they were having a hard time getting my oxygen levels to stay up.
I am still worried but since I don't smoke anymore I am hoping I won't have such a bad time.
Also, I heard from my sister tonight. My mother isn't doing good and she said that she probably wouldn't last much longer. My mother has been suffering from dementia for a while and in a way I have been grieving because she hasn't been herself for a long time. I feel like I lost my mother a long time ago. I am trying to decide if I want to go to California to say my good byes. I went through this 4 years ago when my father was dying and by the time I got there he didn't know who I was and it was very painful to see him that way. The last time I saw my mother she was still doing pretty good and I don't know if I want to see her now and remember her this way, yet I want to say good bye.
My sister is going to see her soon and she will hopefully be able to tell me more about her condition and I will decide then.
Physically I am doing better all the time. I hope I don't have a set back after the surgery. I know that I tend to get depressed after surgery.
I am still worried but since I don't smoke anymore I am hoping I won't have such a bad time.
Also, I heard from my sister tonight. My mother isn't doing good and she said that she probably wouldn't last much longer. My mother has been suffering from dementia for a while and in a way I have been grieving because she hasn't been herself for a long time. I feel like I lost my mother a long time ago. I am trying to decide if I want to go to California to say my good byes. I went through this 4 years ago when my father was dying and by the time I got there he didn't know who I was and it was very painful to see him that way. The last time I saw my mother she was still doing pretty good and I don't know if I want to see her now and remember her this way, yet I want to say good bye.
My sister is going to see her soon and she will hopefully be able to tell me more about her condition and I will decide then.
Physically I am doing better all the time. I hope I don't have a set back after the surgery. I know that I tend to get depressed after surgery.
WLS 10/28/2002 Revision 7/23/2010
High Weight (2002) 240 Revision Weight (2010) 220 Current Weight 115.
I probably will. I know it was hard when my dad died but at least I did get to say good bye. I would have regretted it if I didn't see him before he died. It was just so hard because he wasn't himself and I didn't want to remember him that way but it was the right thing to do.
WLS 10/28/2002 Revision 7/23/2010
High Weight (2002) 240 Revision Weight (2010) 220 Current Weight 115.
(((((Tazz))))
Hang in. You are dealing with a whole lot right now and none of it sounds like fun. Is there anything you can do for yourself to give yourself a little boost? (nails? massage? idk, even taking a walk on a spring day or planting some flowers?).
Lame advise, I know, but it's coming from the right place. If it's okay, I'll be praying for you, and I hope you keep us posted as things progress with your surgery and your mom.
more ((((tazz))))
Hang in. You are dealing with a whole lot right now and none of it sounds like fun. Is there anything you can do for yourself to give yourself a little boost? (nails? massage? idk, even taking a walk on a spring day or planting some flowers?).
Lame advise, I know, but it's coming from the right place. If it's okay, I'll be praying for you, and I hope you keep us posted as things progress with your surgery and your mom.
more ((((tazz))))