My friend with the big mouth

 I have a friend who I thought I could trust by telling her that I was having weight loss surgery.  Well, apparently not because I found out she told a mutual friend of ours who I know for a fact cannot keep her mouth shut.  It's my fault that I told her so now I guess I'll be paying the consequences.  My fear is I've lost weight before on my own and whenever I went to a gathering whether it be a family function or out with friends, I'd hear, "are you supposed to be eating that?" or, "be careful or you'll gain all that weight back again!" or "Oh I'm taking this dish away from you because you can't eat it," or if I happened to be wearing loose clothing on a particular day, I'd hear, "are you putting on weight again?"  My husband started it the other day when I was making lunch consisting of a half cup of chicken salad.  He said, "are you going to eat ALL that!"  WTF!!!  So now that all of my friends are going to know about my WLS I feel like I'm going to be under a microscope and scrutinized for everything I put in my mouth!  

And now that they know I have a function coming up in a few weeks and I know they're going to ask me a million questions and when my back is turned I'll be judged for what I did.  I don't know what to do or what to say to people when they ask me stupid questions or decide what I can and cannot eat.  I wish people would just leave me alone sometimes.

I don't expect any responses from anyone but thanks for letting me vent. 

I know exactly how you feel!  i only tols certain people because my extended family can be judgemental and harsh!  Next week will be my first family get together since the sleeve, let the nay saying begin!

 
Let me just say this......

Don't let all that outside crap effect you!

Concentrate on the task at hand.

Don't let anybody or anything get in your way.

This is your chance to eliminate all those concerns.

How can you be criticized for taking steps to better yourself ?

Not your problem....It's there problem or jealousy.

Do your thing......Make it work !

frisco

** Here is a comeback I had prepared ready for anyone who was gonna give me any crap. I never had to use it cause everyone was supportive. I chose to be open about my WLS. 

"I can lose the weight......how are you going to fix stupid?"

LOVE it, Frisco! How do you fix stupid, indeed!

First off, in general, people suck.

Second, wait till you drop 100 pounds, they'll be whining that your too thin.

They're never happy but the cool thing is that YOU can be, so to hell with all of them.

I was apprehensive about attending a function last weekend- was just waiting to hear crap about my surgery-

I got some good advice from people on here:
Remember, you are a lady and gravitate towards those who are kind and positive and dont even engage those who are negative, it feeds their ego!!

Also, no one knows the ins and outs of our eating plan so they can go pound sand. My mom is always like "you dont eat enough!" ummm...i had surgery so i dont eat like a pig any more, no one said anything when i filled my plate 3 times!

OMG!! Sasy,

I remember when I was sick with heart problems and lost over 100 lbs. I was down to like 149. when i got home from the hospital i could fit a size 8. i was so happy I was well and very skinny. People around me did not seem to be happy for me. I was told you look sick skinny, you look better big. You just don't look right like this. I felt so bad that I uncunciouly gained all of the weight back. Also when I had lost the weight I had noticed that every female in my life was dieting. WTH. Could it be that I was the fat one and nonthing was going to change that for them.

People are mean and they will say things. And your right nobody ever said you are unhealthy you need to loose weight, lets excercise togetere, because they were all fine with me being the fat one and not them.

You made a great decision to have your sleeve and you didn't take that decision lightly. 
Smile sweetly if they ask you if you are aloud to eat what you are eating and say Yes I am thank you.  then walk away.
Good luck

 I love Frisco's advice " Do your thing Girl!"  I have someone at work (a cardiologist) who elected himself food police a few years ago and would always come in our breakroom and critic our lunches and snacks.  He would always make comments like " I don't think that is on your program!" or "Child I know where that is going to go (meaning my stomach or my butt)!"  He was obnoxious about it and made everyone (even the people without weight issues) feel uncomfortable.
Guess what Karma has a sense of humor!
He is now sporting a big  belly, a double chin, and a big old butt of his own!  Even one of his patients told him that he got really fat! I heard it!  I just walked away.  
I have 4 more weeks before I return to work.  When I go back to work I just want to look amazing! 
I know that he probably won't say anything but I know that he will notice.  Maybe he can wear my old lead because I hope that mine won't fit when I return to work.
As far as being judged for what you did, try not to let that bother you.  Haters judge!  Remember who you are doing this for.  Yourself.  You are taking steps to improve yourself and your health and your overall sense of well being!  Hold your head up high!  Stand tall and be proud!  You are doing this and you deserve to be successful!  Amaze everyone!!!

Go get em!

Holly

Another way to look at it!They just might care my kids 22,17,13 have made themselves my police.Mom slow down its going to hurt,Can you have that without hurting.I hear this alot and I know they care. So I smile and say thanks for loving me!!!!So maybe it is their way of caring just smile think positive and go on with what you are doing.