Confusion of a BIG man!

Hi my name is Vinny Mac and I'm a food addicts . Tomorrow will be two years since VSG surgery I've  lost 259 lbs and I'm very happy about it  But all the craveings and late nite Bingeing have came back . There is not a day or nite when I don't won't to eat. I hate the filling of being helpless over food. Thank goodnees I can't eat as much as I use to and I love workingout as much as I do are I would gain every pound I lost back. I know its all mental but it so F.cking hard. I HATE food its the drug I can't shake. My depression is at a point that It has never been even before wls.I'm not trying to get replys but sometimes it helps to talk about. Anyway everyone keep up the good work.

Vinny

I am so sorry your demons have come roaring on back, my friend. 

This book helped me to set up structure about when I could eat the foods that were triggery for me.

10 Thin Commandments is what its called, this is actually the book and not where to buy it, but it does not have his recommended diet in the back, which is not good for the likes of me anyway, but..

Yea.  All that old stuff can come calling any time, esspecially when things are rough or have been rough.  It can also turn into other stuff we never thought it would, drinking, gambling, sex, cleaning (well.. I have heard..cleaning. ).  :}

For me the trick has been to learn to deal with the trigger, which for most junkies is not the FOOD, its a feeling, a thought, an event, and food is just where we end up turning.  Same for most all junkies, we just do not handle something well, and then turn to our drug of choice.

Anyway, can you find someone to talk to face to face there, my friend?

http://books.google.com/books?id=Nl2bfrlGW4AC&lpg=PR1&ots=Fr kuEEWBTi&dq=%22thin%20commandments%22&pg=PR4#v=onepage&q&f=f alse

I think Waffleking put a link to a lady who has helped him in his latest post - maybe that could help?

Anyway *squeeze* and I hope you find some help soon, my friend.  Get your triggers away and get ready for a bit of discomfort, but better to be miserable going through than to be miserable staying in.

Be sweet, it *is* hard, but its do-able.

thank you for your transparency and for sharing, my friend.  Its good for you and its good for us.

 You have done such an incredible job losing weight!  But I know how easy it is to sabotage your awesome hard work.  I was a forever yo-yo dieter because the food always won.  Have you thought about Overeaters Anonymous?  How about getting on some type of anti-depressant?  I was really reluctant to go on an anti-depressant after I got post-partum depression but it helped work a 180 on me.  
Please, keep talking about it!  Let it all out because no one knows better about food demons than we do!

Hang in there Vinny. Look back over the last 2 years and how far you have come. The things that you are physically able to do now, like take beautiful trips to Alaska (I'm still very jealous by the way!!).
Food will always be that nagging little memory in the back of our minds. Be strong, you can fight this one. And of course, there is always the support of your buddies here on OBH.

Sorry you are going through all of this. Try and fill your house with only healthy things that way if you binge, you'll be binging on food that is good for you, and with your tiny tummy it won't be much of a bing anyway.... I have pickles and olives stuffed wih jalepeno'sin my fridge ALWAYS, When my stress goblin sends me straight to the fridge before I know I'm even on route I open it and there at my eye level is a jar of Klausen's and my olives... So i have one pickel and of course my sleeve is full, so I go back to life...Don't know if it will help you but I can't even count the times I've ended up at the fridge and don't even remember getting up or even thinking about food, and a pickle doesn't hinder my progress as far as I can see...not that I lose at any alarming speed, but I dont' want it to get any slower!

Hang in there brother we are all here to help you and support you, lean on us! {{{HUGS}}}}

Stacey

Hey Vinny, this battle really is hard and it's natural to get down now and then,  I think a visit to OA could be helpful or some one on one counseling.  Antidepressants are a good idea to help you through this especially tough spot.  It's a shame we can't cut all contact with food like other addicts can.  Just keep coming here to vent, but look into the other stuff too.  Good luck Vinny, your success has inspired a lot of us and we are all here for you.

so loving all the support on this board. When I need to binge, I eat these steamers veggy bags-the ones without the sauce and cheese. I know what its like to be addicted to food-i have yet to get my sleeve. To help lessen the calorie impact-i buy tons of frozen bags of veggies and force myself to eat those-hey its better than boxes and boxes of ramen noodles-which I have eaten sadly. Also, I force myself to drink hot liquids, tea, coffee-it helps me to feel full. I also brush my teeth alot-sounds weird but it helps with the oral fixation. hope it all works out for you friend.

I love all of you guys so much from the new people to the people that have been here longer then me. It just a very bad thought that all the weight could come back. Its just a bad time for me right now i'm not a Xmas person (childhood ****) so In my past food is my go to support and because of that I was 553lbs .I fill better already.

Thanks to everyone
Vinny Mac

Your accomplishment is magnificent and a real inspiration.

Can you have a visit with the psychologist that did your evaluation during the approval process? Mine told me I could call her in the future if I needed. I don't think there is any reason why I couldn't call her otherwise. Just think she was letting me know my insurance pays for so many visits if I wanted to use them. She was pretty cool and is a lap band patient so she is sympathetic to the issues we face.

Dude, you've saved your own life. I buried my brother in law yesterday. He was a big guy too, and died in his recliner at age 47, with no warning whatsoever. My sister and 11 year old niece are broken hearted.

I wanted to eat my damn face off yesterday. People brought tons of food: lasagna, ham, mac & cheese, homemade brownies, cookies, cake, caramel rolls ... Did I work a perfect plan? No. But I didn't go apesh*t crazy either.

I'm back home and back on track, back to the gym tonight. Life and death doesn't care if I had WLS or want to lose weight. It's on me.

And you. You've done this. It is a sucky time of year. We love you. Now think about a counselor or medication (but not Paxil, that **** is evil). They're just more tools in the toolbox.

Hang tough, big hearted guy.