My supportive husband is becoming not so supportive.

   My husband doesn't have a weight problem, doesn't make jokes at mine, is super duper supportive and everything I could ask for.  BUT He keeps saying after I lose my weight I'm going to leave him.  It was just something I rolled my eyes about at first, but now that its coming closer (June) He is REALLY starting to become withdrawn and if I talk about the surgery, he'd rather change the subject.   WTH???  I was 190 when I met him, had my lap band and vomiting non stop, he's been with me thru fills, unfills, etc.  Now that I'm back up to 250 It seems he wants me to stay here.  I don't understand what gives.  BUT its really starting to **** me off.  I'm becoming quite offended that he reallly feels this way.  REALLY?  thats all you think of me? I'm that shallow that I can be with you if I'm fat but I"m gonna scram once I look good physically??? Our sex life has suffered tremendously with my weight gain, my self esteem, I don't want to go to family gatherings b/c i'm ashamed of the regain.  How can he be so negative about this?  I'm afraid he's going to push me away as my date comes further.  Any of you have this problem?  

When my husband had his sleeve done, I felt the same way your husband did. Granted, if I brought it up, it would only be in a joking way, because I didn't want to annoy or upset him, and I figured he didn't need that stress before surgery, but still.

The surgery affects all couples in different ways. In fact, it can really affect all of your relationships- with friends, family, etc... some in more positive ways than others, depending on the people involved. I'm very blessed that I have a group of friends who are being super supportive of what I'm doing, while my mother-in-law is trying to talk me out of going and my own mother annoyed me tremendously on Sunday night by calling me in tears because she was so worried about me. I don't like seeing my mom upset, and she's upset ALOT, for different reasons, and I just couldn't handle it that night.

Can you sit down with him and explain how you feel? Maybe even remind him that you're going to need his help and his emotional support very very soon? I bet he comes around when the time gets closer. Just like we as patients are going through a wide array of emotions in preparation for this, so are the people who love us.

I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and say that maybe he went online and found the several...and I mean SEVERAL support groups for spouses whose parteners left them or cheated on them when their husband/wife had WLS.  It's actually something very real - and there are very high numbers - so his concern is definitely justified.
It's not that he doesn't have high esteem of YOU...he doesn't have high esteem of HIMSELF.
My ex-husband was the same way.  He met me when I was a good weight and after we got married I packed on the pounds.  He never complained about my weight, but I would always see him looking at thin women.  Then whenever I would try and lose weight, he would sabotage me.  Even my family noticed (my brother actually, so it was a guy noticing a guy).  Sometimes they have a "comfort zone" and they think the weight loss will break that comfort zone.  Maybe he's worried other men will look at you?  I know my husband now gets ircked when other men look at me or talk to me needlessly... each guy is different.  Try to broach the subject with your husband or have someone you trust talk to him and see what's REALLY worrying him.
When my one friend had the surgery, her husband also became distant.  He told her he was worried that she would die.  Not sure if that was true.  He became so distant that she did end up rekindling an old flame relationship with another man because of how much he neglected her.  So don't let it get to that point.  Try and work it out before surgery so that he can be there to support you when you need it most during healing and recovery.

I do understand that its a real issue.  His sister had a friend that left, he knows another guy that had it and became a cheater, etc.  I get that.  BUT this is our 2nd marriage (for both) We were single a very long time before getting married again.  Me 10 yrs, him 18 yrs.  So, I know there isn't anyone else out there that is a better fit for me.  I just keep telling him to wait and see.  Thats all I can say at this point, b/c I refuse to let this get me down.  I think I need to chill out a lil bit when it comes to the surgery (Im a bit obsessed and talk about it a lot) Hopefully that will help.  But I'm so excited and want to share this with him.  

I go through the same thing and must say that the comments not only come from him but everyone around him and me... We've been together for 8 years... When he met me I was a size 16 at the weight of 215.  I was 391 before my weight loss journey and am down to 350 since last week... Everyone, I mean EVERYONE, says, O he better watch out now you are going to leave him and to them and him I say, the only thing that will make me leave is your constant insecurity! 

I am and will be the same person ALWAYS!

It has taken a year for my husband to glom onto the fact that I will still cook for him and not leave, blah blah blah. It takes time, just trust in the process.

Awww... I think it's kind of cute when they're insecure, but I know it'd be annoying to hear that kind of stuff all day every day! sit down with him n have a LONG talk, i'm sure he just needs ur reassurance... when ppl around us change so quickly, it's bound to be scary! Let him know how much u love him and that your happy and content in your relationship and no amt of weightloss will change that... let him know that u losing weight will give u more energy and enhance ur lifestyle and quality of life for the 2 of u TOGETHER!

Good luck