My consultation, feelings, a bit of rambling

So I went last week and talked to the doctor that I was referred to. I work in the medical field, so I feel like she was a little more "informative" with cases that she's had is the past etc. I have no idea why but when I was being weighed and given all the questionnaires to fill out, it started to sink in and feel real that I was actually there and getting the ball rolling. It scared the bejeeezus out of me and my heart started racing, my blood pressure read high, and I was a mess! Haha! The reality of 3/4 of your stomach being removed just all of a sudden made me a little sad. My doctor reassured me that my feelings were normal because I shared the fact that I feel that I would feel a bit sad almost as if I had lost a body part. She said its very common and suggested I go to some support groups and visit with those who have gone through the process and those that are further along in the process. Part of me is raring to go and so excited and part is scared and curious about how life will be when food becomes less important, what feeling full instead of stuffed feels like, what it's like to shop in a store for non plus size clothes, or what will I look like and how will my health be in 10 years? I think her suggestion is great and I'm looking forward to attend the support group. I don't have any kids but would like to have some in the future and I would definitely like to speak to someone that has had successful pregnancy after surgery. I feel like its the right decision and ultimately staying obese is going to deteriorate my health little by little. Heart disease is predominant in my family. I'm glad I can come here and share how I'm feeling and hopefully someone can relate. I can't wait to visit the group. I wanna know the good, the bad, and the ugly so I'm headed in the right direction.

I think I can relate to you on a certain level.  I have started this process on Feb 21st, and have to lose 10% of my body weight before surgery and that is where I am at this point. I had some of your feelings as well. I am 25 and have never had kids and someday would love too which is why I am having WLS. Pregnancies are fine as far as i know 2 years after surgery. But I cannot wait to break that addiction to food. To eat because I need energy, not because I am craving something. And yes, attend the support groups, they are amazing! Mine only meet twice a month, and having an emotional attachment to food, I need more support throughout the week, and I come here. I love reading the forums and seeing others success' and its such a motivator. Also, I have been blogging a little about my journey so far and feelings that come with it, so that may help you as well. Congratulations on doing something for you and your health and I hope to see more of you around here =)

I too can relate all the way up to rolling me into surgery (2/26/2013), I asked the nurses if they ever had anyone bail and they said "not at this point" and laughed :)  I couldn't wrap my head around taking a perfectly good functioning body part out voluntarily!!! I'm messing with Gods perfect machine.. even tho his machine was overweight.  Its the BEST thing I've ever done for myself.  I mourn the loss of food occasionally, BUT the fat is just melting off.   I look forward to ONEderland and skinny clothes. 

DJ so going into surgery, you were still scared about it? I feel like I would mourn the loss of food but then if u feel full it would probably be just head hunger taunting u, ya know? Maybe morning my stomach that is gone which the doc said was normal but I just see so many people that say it was the best thing they could have done. I'm excited to slowly immerse myself in this change and process.

Yeah, I was a mess right up until I woke up after surgery and realized I was alive. Sigh of relief! There has been no looking back since then and not a single second of regret. Self doubt yes but regret, no.

One thing that helped me a lot pre op was when someone else who had surgery said to me, "your body doesn't feel any different after" and its totally true. For all I know the stomach is still there! Its not like missing a limb that you can actually see and feel.

So no, I really don't miss it in any tangible way at all. As to mourning the loss of food, I know it is hard to imagine, it was like jibberish to me when others and my surgeon said this to me before, but you will still have food and a relationship with it and a gastronomical and culinary life and experiences. In smaller quantities and better qualities, bit you will for sure still eat and eat very well!

Once the first month is behind you, it is going to be ...dare I say "notmal"! And no, just before you start thinking, what's the point then, reset to a different view of what normal really means. It will be a new normal. For me, this new normal is a thousand times better than the old normal. I would not go back for all the tea in China.