My theory of happiness (not as off topic as you think!)

I am a nurse who works in gastroenterology. For many years I did flexible sigmoidoscopy as part of a colon cancer screening program, and, in the process, heard a lot of people complain about their bowel movements. They were too hard, too soft,too frequent, too infrequent, too big,too small. Over time, I came up with my list of the three things required for happiness: as much money as you want, as much sex as you want and the kind of bowel movements you want. I have since added a fourth thing to the list: as much sleep as you want, but I think that is middle age speaking. In the GI world, the goal for stools is bulky and not too hard. If it is roughly the length of your forearm and doesn't hurt coming out and is easy to clean up, you are having perfect stools.
One of the things I see on this forum are woes in the BM department, and I am not immune. It took four weeks post op for me to have anything resembling what I would consider normal. Then I got worried that I would become one of the constipated ones, so I started taking Benefiber every day, working up to a heaping tablespoon every morning in my first cup of water. I will be at six weeks tomorrow and am happy or report that, at least for today, I meet the third criteria for happiness. And I will keep going with the Benefiber.

This is a delightful post! I am smiling...!

Since you seem to have wonderful insight on this important topic, I am thinking that you may have an answer to a question that is currently occupying some of my mind. You see, I  am not having really any problems in the department of which you speak, all is, shall we say -- well formed, comfortable to pass, occuring at least daily, etc etc. BUT since VSG on March 11 2013, the time of day of the event is no longer regular, which for me was first thing in the morning. It has been close to first thing, but only once. Most of the time it is 11am, 2 pm, 4pm, etc etc.

My problem is that I looooooove my long long walks in the morning, and prior to surgery, I had already had my... moving experience before hitting the trail. Now, with things not so predictable, I am limiting myself to walking in areas where I know I can get to a toilet within 15 minutes if needed. I have a dread of the possibility of needing to evacuate my bowels whilst being a far distance walk from a toilet...NOT a pleasant prospect!!! I wish that I could get back to my "first thing in the morning" pattern...

So, my wise friend, do you know of any way to train the body to "go" at a certain time of day? It has been suggested that I take some Metamucil or Benefiber at bedtime...I had also been drinking one half cup of Smooth Move tea at bedtime, but it didn't really do the time-setting trick, and my dietitian warned me against using Smooth Move for more than several days in a row because it is a stimulant, and the body could potentially become dependent on it...

What do you think?

Thank you in advance for your wisdom :)

I know they have not replied to you yet but remember that you are not on a regular diet yet considering how far you are out.  You are still on a lot of liquids and not a lot of dense protein yet.  Usually at the beginning it is liquid in liquid out.  Once you get on dense proteins and a regular diet at about 6-8 weeks then your body will adjust and you may find that you run into the problems that others have.  I use to be like you before the surgery and after the surgery but it has all slowed way down.  I now take Fiber Advantage gummies daily and that has seemed to help and if doesn't then I will eat some oatmeal or a pieces of low calorie bread.

Thank you for your advice. I don't even pretend that I have anything other than today figured out. Today was good. I do have a long way to go and I know there will be bumps and hills, etc., but today I am having a great day, and that makes me happy.

Hmmm, were you drinking real coffee before surgery? With caffeine? For many people, that is what leads to the routine morning event. Without the coffee, hard to say what else could have the timing effect you long for. Wish I had an easy answer for this one. Although, if you are far enough out from surgery that you wanted to risk a morning cup of coffee, it might be worth trying. I am so new at this that I wouldn't do it, but it sounds to me from my readings like lots of people do return to caffeine after surgery. Other than that, my only suggestion is the undesirable plastic bag and baby wipes.

This is something for me to think about as I begin to plan some summer hikes.

The nutritionist was right on about the tea. Things like Benefiber, citrucel, Metamucil are only habit forming in the way that any high fiber diet would be.

MiraLax can be unpredictable in terms of the timing of results, as can other laxatives. The best advice for these laxatives is don't use them unless you need them.
Good luck.

Agree with the morning coffee routine.