kick in the ass

I need a kick in the ass. just because I was upset with someone I ate four slices of pizza. Now I can hardly move and I feel sick to my stomach. I don't know why I did that, it didn't hurt the person I was mad at, they didn't even know. Why do I still punish myself with food.

You don't need a kick in the ass. Clearly, you're giving it to yourself! LOL.

What you do need to think about is why you continue to use food to cope with stressful situations. I have been doing a lot of soul searching myself about my use of food. It is a very personal thing, but I can tell you it is extremely satisfying to sit with the issue, feel the real emotion and be able to move on from it - all without using food.

What you are describing is a big deal. You know it. I know it. It's probably the biggest elephant in our WLS room - emotional eating.

BTW, I don't think you are punishing yourself with food. I think you are trying to soothe yourself the way you once did, only it just isn't working the same way. You will get through this, IF you do the work.

Know that you are not alone and there are many here who are willing to help, myself included, and are just a PM away.

 

Thank you. Tomorrow is a new day and I will begin again.

Kairk, this answer is a great example of why you and others are so beloved here.  You answer with such real COMPASSION.........and still without any sugar-coating (poor analogy, but it fits).  Every one of us (I'm reasonably certain) has used food in that way.  You've given us a way to frame the issue, own it, and a way to attack it.  I bet you're a great teacher!

 

Chanteuse1, I agree 100%! 

I heart this!

My first reaction is OMG - how'd you fit it?!?!

((((hug))))   ((((hug))))   Sorry that you are hurting yourself with food - we all have bad days when we make bad choices -but this was clearly painful!  i think this would be something good to explore with a therapist so you can figure out why you are doing that to yourself.

Now no more of that - you could really hurt yourself!!!!  (my tummy hurts just thinking about it!)

Thank you for asking the question!  I think every one of us has used food for something other than fuel.  If we spend some time thinking about why we do it, maybe we can  find healthier alternatives and break the cycle.  I'm not there yet, but I'm working on it diligently..............good luck!

No kick in the ass needed, but a hug and a chat.

You've already done the deed, so now what you have to focus on is how will you handle this differently next time?  We can no longer medicate ourselves with food to soothe the stress that others cause us, so we have to find other healthy ways to do this.  I agree with Lucy...this is where a therapist can be really helpful in teaching you the coping skills you need AND getting to the root of why you are actually eating the thing you are eating. 

I think the idea of mindfulness doesn't just apply to what we eat, but WHY we eat as well.  The next time this person upsets you, think about why you are upset with them, and then think about how you will deal with those feelings that doesn't involve using food to medicate yourself.

You will get through this and move past it and learn from it. 

My friend.
I don't know what to say other than I feel for you. Devon is right, we are not punishing ourselves with food, we use it as a coping mechanism. I am still trying my darnest to figure this all out because in the end after I've eaten something I shouldn't have when it's clear to me I was just eating, a lot of time its just out of habit or it tastes good but I also usually get to the point where I'm uncomfortable too. We can work on this, it's all in the learning process. Believe me, I know how difficult it is to deal with this problem another way when I've been dealing with this for the past several decades but we can continue to just take things day by day.
Chin up!!!