I'm telling everyone....

I know there are different views on the subject of telling or not telling people that you have had WLS.  I am normally a private person, which would make sense if I didn't tell anyone about my surgery.  But while I'm private about my personal life, I am also known for saying whats on my mind, telling like it is, not beating around the bush, and not sugar coating anything.  With that being said, I have decided to tell anyone that asks.  I have already told the co-workers in my office that I'm going for WLS on March 7th.  One of my supervisors told me after our conversation about it that he felt he was in a health class in school, thanked me for the information and wished me luck.  Being overweight is a problem that I have dealt with for years now.  I lost my dignity a long time ago.  When my co-workers (about 7 in my area) and I were talking about me going to Tijuana to have the surgery, the biggest question they had was "why?".  I told them that I needed to improve my health.  Not want to, but needed to.  I also shared that if I had a choice, I would not be as heavy as I am now.  I told them that when I board the airplane to fly for this surgery, the thing I dread the most is asking for a seat belt extender from the flight attendant.  I'm tired of not fitting on a roller coaster, I'm tired of having to stand at the beauty salon because my fat a$$ cannot fit in their cute little chairs. I'm tired having heat rashes in the summer between the rolls, etc.  Bare all, bar none.  IMHO, it doesn't hurt to share various struggles and things they never gave thought to before.  Not only does it give them the answer to the question why, it also helps them to not take themselves for granted.  Another reason I am telling people is accountability.  I eat my breakfast at 10:30pm and my lunch around 1:00am.  I usually have a snack around 4:00am, then if I have dinner, it's around 7:00am, go to bed at 10:00am, get up around 7:30pm and do it all over again. Since I eat 2 meals and a snack at work around my coworkers, they will police me.  A few have already vowed to do one ounce of water every five minutes with me so they, too, can increase their water intake.  One vows he will "TRY" not to drink during his meals at work.  If I even come close to falling off the wagon at work, I have 7 "enforcers" to kick my shrinking butt back on track before it happens.  I think they are more excited for the surgery than I am because they are looking forward to bossing me around (I supervise 5 of them).  There is ONE person I am keeping this a secret from... my daughter.  I will be 6 or 7 months post op before I can see her again (she's in the military), and I want to walk off the plane and right past her without her recognizing me.  That's going to be my ultimate NSV.  

Ultimately, it's each individuals decision whether to tell or not tell people about VSG/WLS.  I really don't believe there is a right or a wrong, just personal preference.  Thanks for letting me spill my guts, and I welcome any feedback you feel like giving!!!  Have a wonderful day, stay safe, and be careful!

~Big Red LT

Congrats to you! I am not really open about surgery and I always envy and applaud those people are open about it. I'm glad that you have the support of your co-workers!!

Thank you!  I expected some support, but I did not expect the enthusiasm that came with it.  Never know!

You are right - everyone chooses to share or not share based on their own personal beliefs or values.  I'm like you - I tell everyone.  If there is just one person I tell that becomes more educated on obesity issues or one person that decides to take control of their health after listening to me, then I figure I've done a good thing.  I knew going in that some responses would be similar to "I'd never take the easy way out", or "I'd never have surgery to correct my weight problem".  The people I tend to hear that from are very overweight themselves.  A couple of times I responded back "how's your way working for you"?  It's a little mean, but it shocks them into realizing what they've said.  Or, if I get negative comments, I'll just say "thanks for the feedback" and walk away.

So I applaud you - until we're out of the closet, fat shaming will continue to be the norm, and WLS will be viewed an unfathomable choice for many.  Your daughter is going to be so proud of you, in more ways than one!

Good for you. The final reason I have decided to have surgery was because a supervisor at my work was very open about having it and told me the good the bad and the ugly through the whole process she had hers in march of 2013 and I had mine in dec. I too am pretty open if anyone asks my whole life changed and I knew the people I worked with would notice I spend a lot of time with them. They have all been very supportive and helpful even called and text me while I was off to just check up.

Good for you!  When I finally knew I was doing this for real (this time - I backed out once before) I started telling people.  I'm the type to tell it like it is and my life is a pretty open book.  I don't leave a lot of room to be judged because I believe if you aren't showing conviction about your life then somebody else will and they will not always be nice.

Having these side effects I've had and seeing that I will be going back to work almost 3 months after surgery they are in for the shock of their lives.  I've already lost 30lbs and gone from a 16/18 to a 14.  I'm sure there are a lot of people that have noticed my absence but if they aren't on my team they probably don't know I've been sick.  I expect a lot of questions and I plan to be honest.

What a great surprise and gift you are giving your daughter.  I didn't realize how much my mom's weight effected her life until I got older and had to care for her.  Her death is what prompted my sister and I to get serious and do something; we did it for our kids and ourselves.  We didn't ever want to put them through that.  And my mom probably never got over 200 (which in my world is a pretty good weight on my body).  It goes to show you that it doesn't have to be 100 extra pounds to effect you.  50 will do it.

Not only are you giving yourself the gift of health but also your friends and family that can share each days joy with you as you age instead of the sorrow of watching you deteriorate.

I applaud you!

Thank you all for the replies!  It is comforting to know that I am surrounded on this site by beautiful people!  Everyone has their reasons for doing things, and each unique person brings something to the table that compliments the rest of us!

Thank you for sharing, I have had much success in having those I know best at work as my support team. They have gotten use to my "new" way of eating and always say how awesome I look, which really makes me feel good. Your daughter will be so proud of you, and that is truly motivational.