Calming my wife's nerves.

Two more days until surgery, my wife is very nervous and I am very excited and not nervous in the least. The fact that I have no trepidation about the upcoming surgery is not helping her. I have done tons of research and watched countless hours of you tube videos concerning VSG. After having learned as much as I could both positive and negative I could not find anything to dissuade me from the benefits of this wls.  Has anyone else experienced a similar situation?  Should I be nervous? Anyone have any tips to help alleviate my wife's fears?

I never felt nervous, but I think that it's completely normal.  I think your wife's nerves are totally normal too.  Honestly, even though this is hard to do, I think it's one of those things that you (both of you) just have to accept.  Yes, she's nervous.  That's okay.  You're having major surgery!  It's a normal thing to be nervous about!  Don't try to "fix" the nerves, since there's nothing wrong with feeling them.  Just accept that they exist, and get on with life.  

I would tell her that you are taking control of your health. If you don't have the surgery, you are headed to years of health issues which would not be fun for either of you. By having the surgery, you are showing her how much you love her and how much you want to live and be with her. 

Good luck. I had no complications & I'm already off 2 meds that I was on and I hope to be off more meds soon.

Helen

Just hold and love her through it.  Nerves are normal and she is reacting like someone normal reacts to when someone they deeply love is going in for surgery.  Remind her of how much longer she is likely to have you because of this surgery, tell her all the really fun things you will do together after you are healed.  Paint a picture of a beautiful future for her, make sure that she clearly sees herself next to you in this new future.  Ask for her love and support and help her concentrate on all the ways that she can help you post surgery.  Did I mention hugging and holding her?  Do more of that.  Hugs.

Give her a task list so she'll feel involved in the process.  She's going to be scared anyway, but she'll have something to do that you've told her will help you in the process.