1 year

Feb 15, 2010

Wow...it's been a year plus a few days since I got banded. I have to admit that I have definitely learned ups and downs with the band but I don't regret the choice I made to have it done, not one little bit. I started out, at my heaviest being 268 lbs., I am finally down to about 195 lbs. (give or take a few depending on the day...) I am not down where I wanted to be by now but I know a lot of that is my own fault and not the band's. I have learned that I suffer from "last bite syndrome" because I either love the taste of the food so much that I try to get that one last bite down OR I hate the idea of wasting something and try getting that last bite down. I have had consequences for it, too. With our lives being in constant chaos: work, school, football games, basketball games and other events that have taken up our time, I have to admit that my family has ate a lot of junk. That's including me...And the holidays didn't help. I am not big on baking and such but for some reason I decided to bake over 500 cookies for the holidays. Why? I have no idea...but I did it. In the process, there was cookie dough sampling, licking of the beaters and spatulas. Not to mention partaking in the actual baked treats. Granted, I can't eat cookies like I used to be able to but I know I definitely had more than I should have! 

So here I am today....trying to get back on track. I haven't been in to see Dr. Holloway since the beginning part of November. I haven't needed a fill and honestly couldn't afford any more trips to see him for 2009. But I think I have finally found my sweet spot. On most part, my band is really tight in the mornings where I can only sip on my sugar-free chai in the mornings. I usually have to be careful what I eat for lunch. There are breads and tortillas and some pasta stuff that one day will be fine but the next day cause a stuck episode. And during my TOM, my band tends to feel even tighter even into the evening. A lot of it is trial and error. I have learned that fried potatoes of any kind don't seem to agree with me. But that's a good thing because things like french fries, tater tots, etc. are not a good thing to be eating anyhow! And as much as I love tomatoes, sometimes I do have a hard time eating them. I am not sure why but I notice it every once in awhile. But anyhow.....

I am trying to get back into a routine of taking breaks at work to get up away from my desk and do some walking. My husband got me an iTouch for Christmas and so I have enjoyed being able to use it to listen to music while on walks- I have learned that I like to walk to the beat of the music and so the faster, more upbeat songs keep me walking at a faster pace and make me feel great! I just have to make myself do it more consistently!!! I know that I also need to increase my water intake. There are days that I do pretty good and then other days where I just bomb at it. I notice that the days that I increase my water intake and also do walking, even if just a little bit, it shows on the scale. I have also noticed that I do better during the week at work than I do on weekends at home. I don't snack as much, drink more water, etc. I also know that I consciously do not partake in more high calorie foods if there are people around who might take notice where if the same foods were at home and I didn't have the audience, I'd probably dig right in. I do know that it makes a difference! But I just need to work at being more disciplined at home and step it up more. I did get Wii Fit Plus for Christmas and also Sports Resort. I need to play on it more because I know that it also helps and I usually see some results on the scale the next day. But what usually happens is that I will walk, drink more water and come home and get on the wii one day. The next day, it will show that I lost like 3 lbs. and I get stoked. I'll drink water and walk at work the next day but then don't get on wii when I get home and will eat a bigger portion at dinner than I know I should and probably follow it with a cookie or brownie. Bad bad bad! And then a couple of days later, I am back up those 3 lbs. I lost. I am my own worst enemy.

So I decided tonight that I would get on here and post on my blog here because I haven't in such a very long time....and I want to hold myself more accountable. I had the lap-band to get my life back, lose weight and enjoy life more. I know I am doing that but I also know I can do better and I am sabotaging my progress. The band is a tool and it will only work as well as I use it. I have known this all along. So it's time I get back in gear and start using that tool for what it was made to do: help me lose weight and keep it off!

So hopefully the next time I am back on here and posting to this blog, I will have much better news to share. I hope that I'll be able to talk about more weight loss, accomplishing more goals and can be more of an inspiration to others. I would love to be at my goal weight by my birthday in July. I know it's possible and I am closer to it now than I am the weight I was at when I started this journey a little over a year ago. Definitely looking on the brighter side!

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