Cristina130

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Okay...I did it. I went onto the scale this morning. I've been neglecting this duty for a long time because it seemed like it would smack me in the face and tell me what was wrong and I didn't want to hear it. Well, I did it this morning.  Not as bad as I had thought, but still not great. But what can I expect when I'm not following the rules. LOL

Anyway, for my official tracking to start again Here is the number to beat..... ;-)

220.2 lbs

After all the encouragement and ideas that you have given me, I am feeling better about beginning.  I'm not as scared I should say.  So, I'm going to be making some changes to try and get back on track. First was to know my weight. Second will be to review the rules again, third will be to impliment the rules into my daily life, and fourth will be to get moving more.

I know it can't all be done overnight, but I have to plan, I have to give myself something to work for. When I first started I really liked charts - it showed me where I was and where I was going. I need to set one up again. Give myself goals to work towards. Maybe even join a challenge.

So, Thanks to all of you.  You mean more than you know!

Cristina

So, how do you do it? How do you get that motiviation back now that it has been gone for so long?  I feel lost and don't know where to start again. I've gained a lot of weight back so all that hard work I had done right after my surgery feels waisted.  I know it is in me somewhere, but it is buried deep and I don't know why and don't know where it is.  My desire was huge....I was losing weight and feeling wonderful.  Now I am gaining weight and feeling horrible.

So, how do I get that desire built in me again?

I did it.  I made myself step on the scale.  I knew I have gained some weight back since my last weigh-in in April.  Yep.  Gained 10 lbs!  OMG!!!  What am I doing to myself?  I have got to get this under control.  But how?  How do I get the motivation back?  The desire has drained from me.  I am trying not to beat myself up but its right there staring me in the face.

I've got to do it....I'm on the path to killing myself with food again. 


WAKE UP, CRISTINA!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I realized the other day that I haven't been here in such a very long time.  To those of you who contacted me to see how I was doing...thank you...and I owe you an apology for not getting back to you.

I will take more time in a few days to give my full update, but I wanted to leave a message that I haven't forgotten all your support and belief.  I know I will need to have it again soon.  I just don't know if I can face you yet.

I am ashamed....I am saddened....I am human....and I know I can come back.  I just don't know if I have the strength to do so yet.

Please keep in touch. I promise that I will be back and with full force soon!

Love to all my dearest friends.....

Cristina

Hey there......

Well, I quit the tax place and am now working at Microsoft in the Benefits Department.  Much better fit for me. I'm a temp on a year long contract but it's still better than the tax place I was at.

I have met someone else who had the lapband.  A parent at the school my kids go to.  I have known her for a while through PTA but didn't know she had lap band.  So we talked a little bit and she has really got me thinking about my habits again.  Also, I need to make another appointment to get a fill.  Maybe that will put me back on track.  

School isn't going well.  I have taken on WAY too much. So I am withdrawing from this quarter's classes.  I probably messed up my financial aid status, but I will worry about that later.  I was just unable to keep up with 4 classes, my kids, new job, financial issues, and my weight loss. LOL  What am I - superwoman?  :-)

Anyway, I will try to update again real soon.  Miss you all!!

Cristina

Hi everyone.  It's been a while since I've logged on to OH and this forum.  It's been crazy for me the past two months.  Since I've received a few emails asking where I've been and what's been going on I thought I should come back and update you. :-)

These past two months I really haven't been focusing on my weight and eating.  We have had severe financial difficulties and almost lost everything.  I have had to go back to work - and am currently working in a evening position at a tax preparers office.  Not my first choice in business because my background is human resources, but it's office work that i know how to do and it's money coming in to help with bills.  So, we are almost back to "on time" payments...which is a relief. 

I have finished up my previous quarter at school...some of you remember I was in a painting class and shared my paintings with you.  But now after spring break we have started a new quarter.  This time I am taking all online classes but 4 of them!  So I really have my work cut out for me.  Two of the classes require a ton of reading and that is where I am now spending my free time - instead of on here with you fine folks.  But if I want to get my degree finished that's what needs to be done, right?  :-)

Now, as far as my weightloss goes......like I mentioned earlier, I haven't been focusing on my eating habits.....which means my eating habits (the bad ones) have all come back.  I'm sad with myself for letting this happen, but in reality, I still am not nearly as bad as back before the surgery.  I have lost a little weight and am now sitting at -45 lbs gone.  But 5 lbs in two months isn't much.  So, hopefully now that our bills are a little more under control and I am getting situated with my school and work schedule I will be able to tackle those bad eating habits once again and be on the right path to my goal. 

I've missed all you guys.....thanks for reading my post and still thinking of me. :-)  I hope to be on here more often in the coming days/months. 

Later....

Cristina

Decided to have surgery 08/27/07: 254 lbs
Pre-Op Weigh in 11/02/07: 242 lbs - 12 lbs
Made it through Surgery-11/2/07! On my way to a better me!
11/09/07: 237.5 lbs - 16.5 lbs
11/16/07: 231.0 lbs - 23 lbs
11/23/07: 228.5 lbs - 25.5 lbs
11/30/07: 229.0 lbs - 25 lbs
12/07/07: 224.5 lbs - 29.5 lbs 
12/14/07: 221.5 lbs - 32.5 lbs 
12/21/07: 224.0 lbs - 30.0 lbs
12/28/07: 225.0 lbs - 29.0 lbs
01/04/08: 221 lbs - 33 lbs
01/18/08: 221 lbs - 33 lbs
01/25/08: 218 lbs - 36 lbs
02/01/08: 217 lbs - 37 lbs
02/08/08: 214 lbs - 40 lbs

This was inspired by (taken from) Nanner (krinannie).....thanks!!  The only difference is that I inputed my numbers and changed a few words.  Amazingly, I am at the same rate as she is....!! 

I was banded 11/02/07. That is 105 days ago. 

I have lost 40 pounds total. That is .380 pounds a day (more than a third of a pound --- bigger than the meat on a McDonalds's 1/4 pound hamburger every day since surgery!)

My BMI has fallen from 42.3 to 35.6, a drop of 6.7!  That moves me from the severely obese category to the obese category....AND I am almost to the overweight category.

I am almost at the "not eligible for surgery" category....except I still have one co-morbidity (sleep apnea).  However.....my other co-morbidities are gone!!!

I have dropped from a 22/24 pant to a 18/20.

I am active in step aerobics and play with my kids more.

I sleep better and am in a better mood.

I fee so much better and actually am beginning to feel sexy again!!

That is only 105 days and 40 pounds. Imagine the next forty pounds and the next forty after that....then I will be within 5  lbs of my goal!!

40 pounds is 32% of what I want to lose. Did I say only 105 days? That means about 315 days and I could be at goal. That means only about another 8 or 9 months!!!!! 

That would be Thanksgiving time....and about 1 year after surgery. I am truly thankful for what I have been given! 

Now THAT is motivation!

Hey there everyone.  Had my 4th fill done today.  No problems - which is a good thing.  If you have followed my story you would know my last one had a little scare.  Thought there might be a leak since there was only 2cc's in there and the chart said 6cc's.  Well, today she checked and all 6cc's she filled me back to was there!!!  Woo Hoo......

So, she filled me up with one more to make me at 7cc's and I was ready to go.  I feel great!

Oh, also my surgeon came out to see me when I was waiting in the lobby.  He's such a nice guy.  LOL  Said he didn't recognize me.  Gave me a hug and just wanted to see how things were going.  So cool........

Anyway, everything's good....no leak.....and filled up ready to get that scale moving even more!!!

Cristina

Although it isn't my "official" weigh in day.....I weighed this morning because I am going in for a fill this afternoon.  I couldn't believe my eyes!!!

214 lbs

That means I have hit the -40 lbs gone goal!!!!!!!!!!!  WOOOO HOOOOOO.  I can't believe it....yet I can.  LOL  Weird huh?  

I love this band.....

Cristina