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On 3/27/2009 I had some news. The doctor says I can the surgery. But still says it maybe some complications especially leaks. It really haven't sink ed in yet. The surgery. Will I be making a mistake.Or it just the right things for me.I do want a new life.This decision. As always been yes for me.I do have some loops To go through first 1.Quit smoking,2. OA classes.And3.  counseling classes. I will be going to an self esteem class This Thursday.. He also talked about the surgery.Its more of an exploring surgery   If they see the last surgery had done to much damage. They will not con tune with the gastric bypass surgery. I wish 30years ago they had this new gastric bypass.procudure.My life of being obese.My life would of been so much better.AndI  wouldn't feel so ashamed of my appearance. Well this is my good news. Thanks for all your support. Edna

02/28/2009 I finally went to kaiser for my weekly weight in at the health department at kaiser. Boy Was I happy. I lost 6 POUNDS. My journal says I have 93LBS pounds to go.Until I get to my goal of 160lbs.This year is my year for a lot of reason. I'm finally going on a airplane. I have never been. And I'm a little scared. But we all have to face them sometimes in our life. I'm about to end a relationship in April.That's where I'm going, This man has been in my life for 4years. But it hasn't went anywhere.I love Him.But He doesn't love me enough. So Its time to move on.The gastric bypass surgery I want, That may never happen. Has got me frozen,  And num.But I must keep the Dream a live,To stick to my direction of my diet plan.   Well my weight now is 253lbs. And a brighter day ahead.Until we meet again.The scale that is.

Hello everyone. It seems ever since my daughter went to the hospital. to have her wls.I have been putting my diet plan out the window.Don't get me wrong.I'm happy for her.she is losing weight everyday.And i just keep eating the wrong things. I do want this surgery.I can't do this alone anymore.even with the risks.I have been on vacation for almost 2 weeks.and i Have got off the wagon.I need help. help help help I really don't want to gain my weight back. I want to do all the right things. Having wls was a goal.I felt would help me. But not to have it. How can I keep trucking. Maybe its because i stay at home.and not go out. I feel i need those restrictions to succeed . 











 

Its been a long journey.I have had my hopes up or wls surgery,for a while.I stopped.A lot of bad habits,Because I want the surgery.I thought it was going to be a snap.But having wls in 1979,Maybe an in possible solution. My old pouch is a mess,and probable beyond repair. I felt sad for a minute.But life goes on. My weight can be control ed.but only by me.There are moments I want to eat what i see.And I realize if i do.I will gain my weight back.10 times over.and I'm tired of being fat.I look at clothes I want to fit in.I want to weight 160lbs.But stress,heart ship confusing obstacles, relationship.found love lost love. It overwhelms me.I don't use food to con fort me.It just happens to be there.I will be working on my emotional self.With the help of experts. My road  and life has came to a point in my life,that change is good.And I'm wiling to change.either I want to sucussed or die trying.I will be 160lbs.That is my goal................................................To love yourself.And stay postive,No matter what.

A new up date. I went to my psychiatric evaluations. She said I need more time. especially since I had a nervous breakdown 2years ago. I have to see a psychiatrist. And go to 8 OA Meetings. She feels Thats. Something In my past, caused me to eat. I really never thought. That was the reason I over ate. Well. We will see, This Journey togather. Everyone have a blessed and wonderful Christmas hugs edna

Happy Holidays
Today I went to kaiser For My upper G I xray. The xray tech. Had a TV Screen.And I could see my stomach.At first I saw  was Something that looked like staples,  where the food comes down. A lot of blackness, even the stomach. The doctor said, My stomach was fully grown and,No staples.I think that is good NEWS.My hopes are high, I think now that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.Keep your fingers crossed.One more xray when they put a tube down your throat.   Good  Good News. I lost 4lbs more. Even through I really ate on Thanksgiving, Maybe because I didn't have to much dessert . I was going to make me a chocolate pie. But Got the wrong pudding mix. One More Holiday eating, Christmas. It may be my last Christmas dinner with the trimmings. Every one have a great and wonderful day.edna

Today I went to kaiser for my weekly weigh in. Good News 5lbs lost.          .My surgeon,office called.My doctor referred me to another doctor for a consultation's.On Friday DEC 5 2008.A phone consultation's.I just don't know what to expect.I had emailed my doctor to ask,Him is it possible for me to get the lap-band.He said NOOOOOOO.It would cause an erosion.And maybe a fatal leak. Whats a woman to do, After she has tried every weight loss products surgery To do?I try to keep hope alive.But if i take the risk of the surgery.Will I be alive.I can only pray to GOD.To give me a sign.I know there are people who cannot have gastric bypass surgery.Who want it so bad,maybe Even more than me.And there some who are blessed with the surgery.Who have failed,And others who has succeed.even those who have went on diets.And has lost 100, 150 200lbs.And has kept the weight off.Can i be successful.without surgery.All my friends viewers thank you.

Hello everyone. It maybe the end of the road for weight loss surgery for me.Yesterday i saw my surgeon. I had gastric bypass surgery when they were first starting out in 1979. The staples came loose. and the doctor did not want to repair the damage. It is now more experence surgeon. The new gastric bypass with greater sucuss. He told me that if certain details in my stomach it may be impossibe for surgery. A lot of scar tissue. But if the position of the stomach is normal. it is possible But with complcations. 1/100 deaths 1/50 complacations 1/50 herna repair in the future 1/50 blood transfusions. 6 to 8 hour operation that will be open. He will be checking the stomach, in which a scope is place in my throat, and and upper GI series. and there will be a comittee to approve it or not.
I ask him should i have the surgery. He said he would'nt. That i could just keep my self on the diet i am on. Well Well Well. I have to ask myself if i can have the surgery should i go on and have it knowing that the risk or high and i may have to go in and out of hospitals for the rest of my life. or should i take the gamble thinking I can beat the odds. I have been beating the odds all my life and i always come out the loser. I have been struggling with my weight all my life. I even had gastric bypass in 1979. With only failure. Is this time going to be different. and this time i will not fail.   Well this is my up date. I don'nt feel depressed over this. I am just disappointed. fffffffffff   Can i get some advice,. On what i should do. If I should go with the surgery If approved with complacaions And if not approved fight for the surgery. Everyone have a great day. And thank you for all your support............:)

Today i went to kaiser to pick up my glasses,and my daughter was seen by the doctor her shoulder was hurting. every week, we go to get weighted, and this week i lost 4lbs.How great is that. And i havent even seen my surgeon. that is this friday. I think i am at goal.But I want my daughter to go first, then i will have my surgery, or we can have it togather. Thanks everyone for your kind.encourgement. These past 7 months has been grand.

total lost from 320lbs to 278lbs.       42lbs.

yesterday 10/30/08 I went to the gym and worked out,I did evern more this time.Its a shame i can only work out once a week. because of my job,and home obligations. but i like this gym. I lost 2lbs this week I think i like this new way of losing weight. cant wait til, next week. the week yes friday i see my surgeon.Hopeful i have lost more pounds