1 year surgiversary - what a ride it's been!!

Mar 22, 2011

So here it is, my one year surgiversary! What a year it’s been. Fantastic, joyful amazing year of discovery and re-discovery. 

Where do I start...I written about my life prior to surgery in an earlier blog. So I’ll take this from the morning of surgery. I weighed in at 120kg (264lbs). I was strangely calm, yet quiet and reflective. I knew this was something that I wanted to do, I had thought about and planned and whilst I didn’t have a goal weight in mind, I had goals. That’s what kept me focussed. 

My mother is elderly and lives in South Africa whilst my family and I are in New Zealand, half a world away. My mother had been ill and we all thought she was dying. I had promised her that if she ‘hung in there’, I would bring the whole family back to visit her for her 95^th birthday. I keep my promises and she’s a stubborn old bird, but the thought of a 24 – 28 hour door to door trip each way was overwhelming. Flying is not only uncomfortable, but painful and embarrassing.  So my first and most important goal was to fly with ‘relative’ comfort back to South Africa in time for her 95^th birthday on the 10^th January 2011.

Next was to kayak with my husband. He had built a beautiful cedar-strip kayak with paua shell inlay and I wouldn’t get into it because I thought I wouldn’t fit. I was also petrified that if by some small chance I did fit and the kayak rolled, I wouldn’t be able to get out.

I wanted to dance and I didn’t have the puff, the stamina to lug my weight around. I love dancing, but was aware of the spectacle of this obese woman gallivanting on the dance floor.

I used to love windsurfing but couldn’t haul myself onto the board, which meant if I fell off while off-shore I wouldn’t be able to get back on again.
 
I have dreams sometimes that I can fly, soar above the land and sea...I wanted to see if I could experience that.

I used to ice-skate, but the picture of this fat old woman on the ice was ludicrous...I wouldn’t even be able to do the boots up. Let alone skiing, which I have never done before... once when my family went to try it, the man at the equipment hire shop indicated, respectfully but clearly, that I wouldn’t be able to fit the ski boots. So I had to toboggan – ungainly, graceless, not a pretty picture.

So how did things change... the weight started to drop off after my sleeve. Six weeks after surgery I started Zumba classes, I was the oldest, fattest and most uncoordinated there, but I didn’t care. As time went on I shrank and learnt the moves... and my increase in stamina meant I could outdance some of the younger ones!!

I started to get into clothes that I had kept in suitcases for years. I began to dress up for functions and allow, no encourage photos to be taken of me. A murder mystery evening, Grease and even the Rocky Horror Picture Show, resplendent with a shocking pink wig.

Then with spring came kayaking, nervously at first and then with growing confidence. (now I have my own – plastic not cedar, but still fast). Then I gave windsurfing a go, technology has advanced so much that I probably need a new board, but I think I should have a few lessons to see whether hurtling across the water at breakneck speed is still something I want to do as I near 50.

Our trip back to South Africa was amazing....firstly was fitting into the airline seat. A precious memory is a microlight flight over the Victoria Falls – awesome. I am so privileged to have done that. How special, a year ago I wouldn’t have made the weight restrictions.

1/1/11 New Years day I did a paraglide off Lion’s Head, part of the Table Mountain range in Cape Town. So beautiful, it truly was like flying. Breath-taking, again a year ago I wouldn’t have met the weight restrictions, let alone been able to manage the hike up to the take off point. And I wore shorts!!! I was in my element, such joy.

In the Eastern Cape about 10 days later I went for a horse ride along the beach with my husband and daughter. I had not been on a horse for about 20 years. I hadn’t want to subject a horse to my weight, animal cruelty and all that. Well, cantering along the beach was truly terrifying... much worse than either the microlight or paraglide... but riding up through the dunes and along the cliff edge watching a pod of dolphins frolicking in the waves was a truly magical experience. I felt so at one with nature.

And then, of course, was my mother’s 95^th birthday. I was delighted to keep my promise.. and didn’t mind the photos ... well most of them.

Since our return I have started rowing, even though getting up at sparrow’s to be verbally abused by the coach is a challenge. I have noticed an increase in muscle tone and stamina. I can fit into a wetsuit that was custom-made for me 30 years ago. Ok, ok breathing is over-rated, as is circulation... but I can fit into it.

A few weeks ago I went rollerblading along Tamaki drive – battled to get the boots to do up over my calves and had to go up a size to get them to do up; (I’m a lot happier in my own skin, now. I accept that I have big legs and that’s just how it is) but such a lot of fun and great exercise. And I have bought vouchers to try skiing at Snow Planet... and if I like it, I might even try on a real mountain. 

So what to do this weekend  after rowing in the morning; shall I try skiing or windsurfing lessons?

What are some of the other changes? Although I considered myself a generally positive person, I didn’t expect the increase in self-confidence and baseline happiness to crank up a few notches. People remark on my ‘presence’ and how I carry myself and interact.  I have developed a cross-addiction .... clothes-shopping. Fortunately I am a bargain-hunter and seldom pay the full price for anything. I seek out sales or buy 2^nd hand designer outfits. Oh, and last week I bought my first pair of zip up boots since 1980. 40% of the original price. Yay!!!

What are the negatives? I vomited water at 3 weeks after unthinkingly gulping it down. And then at 5 months, I vomited after bolting down steak and drinking water afterwards. And then I had a bout of gout – I manage it by drinking water and eating cherries if I get a tingle... I haven’t taken any medication for it. My hair started to thin from about 3 – 6 months, but I was the only one who noticed. Loose skin – who cares, I don’t. The only part that others see is on my arms... my wrinkly tum (kangaroo pouch), upper thighs and origami boobs only come out in the privacy of the bedroom and bathroom.

Regrets? Only that I didn’t do this years ago... and if I had started the process sooner I could have got it done for free through the local district health board instead of self-paying... but don’t regret the investment in getting a life.

Oh and by the way, I’ve lost 50.9kg (112lbs) since surgery and 63.4kg (139.5lbs) since my heaviest ever and now weigh 69.1kg (152lbs). My BMI is now 24.8. I haven’t seen those numbers since the mid-1980s.

Check out my photos!!

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