greensleeved
Emotional and missing being fat?
Aug 05, 2014
Really emotional today, like on the verge of tears for no reason. I think it's the hormone dump because my TOM is over. I found myself looking at my (now thinner) arm and leg yesterday and thinking, "Hey, something is missing." As if by losing weight I am losing part of myself. Had anyone else sort of had to grieve the loss of your fat self? I liked my fat self. It's weird.
I am a college professor so I go back to work in about a week and a half and I have some anxiety about that. I'm not really sure why because the job is fun and low pressure. I'm generally not happy with my life and I am worrying too much, and now that I can't drown my anxiety in some wine and chips and dip I have to deal with it. I have a wonderful family, home and job, none of which I appreciate the way I should. Aside from being mindful of acknowledging the positives in my life what do I do? Ride it out? Hope these feelings go away? I think I'll be in a better frame of mind once I start working again and my weight loss (and thus hormone deluge) slow down. Sometimes too much summer time off is not a good thing. I really don't want to get back on anti-anxiety meds because I hated the way they made me feel. I had my second session with my new therapist the other day and I am so glad I am doing that.
