Sarah B.

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Time flies. I can't believe it's been 3 months already!

It's been a busy month with the mom and the hubby both having their DSes (they're both doing really well, btw). As far as me and my DS are concerned, I've had a "boring" uneventful month. No food problems, no bathroom issues, same 'ol same 'ol. I've lost more than I would have hoped for in my wildest dreams at this point! That's super exciting. I still weigh every day because I just can't help myself. This definitely makes the loss feel slower but I also know that the "stair-step" loss pattern is normal for me so I don't get stressed when the scale says the same thing for days and days. At my 3 month visit to the surgeon's office, my blood pressure was 106/64. I've been off my BP meds since 3 weeks post-op. How crazy is that?! I did get 3 month labs done courtesy of my PCP, so I'll make a seperate post for advice on that when I feel like pulling those numbers out.

I think the biggest difference this month is that it's getting progressively easier to eat. My mom and hubby have both watched me eat at different points since their surgeries and have both said "Will I be able to eat like that some day???" lol I'm not even eating THAT much, but this lets me know how far I've come with my eating. I have "hungry" days where I can eat everything I put on my plate (though I'm getting better at putting more realistic amounts on the plate in the first place). And some days where just a few bites makes me feel stuffed--even if it's the same food in the same quantity I ate completely the day before. I'm still shocked by the portions that "normies" are able to eat. I was chatting with a friend on the other side of the country one night. We had both gotten Taco Bell on the same day. I had one Taco Supreme and was stuffed. He had gotten FIVE flour tortilla burritos of various kinds (burrito supreme, bean burrito, meximelt, 5 layer burrito, and something else I can't remember but was along the same lines). He ate them in one sitting. The bastard isn't even heavy! I couldn't have eaten that much even at my hungriest as a pre-op but now it's UNFATHOMABLE to me that ANYONE could eat that much. I have to laugh at myself and my DS-brain.

I'm down 84 pounds as of my surgiversary (which was actually 13 weeks post-op--gotta love the way "months" work). My wows:

* Hearing wedding bands clinking against each other. I actually thought the stones in my engagement ring were loose because I kept hearing this little rattle sound. After some investigation, I realized that both bands are actually loose enough on my finger that they're hitting against each other. No loose stones. :D

* Being able to stand straight & look down at scale without tucking belly in to read the number. That's fun!

* Seeing how much chubbier my face is in all the pics I once thought were "cute" on Facebook. Guess I need new "cute'" pics. Hehe.

* Being told by my mother-in-law that I needed to buy new scrubs for work because it "looks like you are wearing someone else's clothes!" What a lovely compliment. :) So I did go buy new scrubs, finally. Before I would buy unisex 3X. Always unisex because the cuts were the roomiest, especially in the arms. Pre-op, these 3X were getting REALLY tight, especially around the belly. Went shopping and found that I fit in a women's XL for both tops & bottoms!!!! This is a big deal because I could NEVER have gotten a ladies cut in a scrub top before.

Photowhoring:

Pre-Op, Christmas 2008. Just came across this pic yesterday and was really shocked to see myself.


In my snazzy new XL ladies scrubs! In true photowhore fashion, this pic was taken in the bathroom mirror at work. How cheesy. LOL But hey, I was feeling cute.

<-- That is me today, doing a happy dance! I'm down 74lbs, which is half way to my goal loss of 148. I'm at 50% EWL. Yaaaaay!!!! I'm two days shy of 12 weeks out. I know the loss will slow down but I'm actually feeling truly optimistic about making it to my goal weight--that goal weight that before was a total fantasy number for me. I  my DS!

I have found mine.

It is The Food Network in HD.

I never just sat around watching Food Network before (aside from Good Eats, but my 10-year long crush on Alton Brown is a different story ). I generally dislike cooking. I find many of the hosts annoying. But the food....oh the beautiful, succulent looking food. It's not even food I like to eat (brocolli, for example). But it just looks so damn pretty. It's fun having it on in the background of whatever I'm doing (which, at this point, is ignoring an 18-month in my lap asking for "Garney," err, Barney).

Who am I and what has this DS done to me?!

I've been a bit absent the last couple weeks or so because of the holidays. It's just been a busy time. I hit 8 weeks out yesterday...though in the odd truth about weeks/months, I won't be 2 months out until Monday. I think I'm going to maximize that factor and count my "2 month" loss from Monday's weight.

At 8 weeks I am officially down 60lbs. That's unbelievable to me! I expected the DS to work its magic, but was mentally prepared for slower loss. My weight loss has been following that "stair step" pattern, which doesn't bother me. I'm still scale obsessed. I enjoy checking it every day, even if it hasn't moved that day. I find it reassuring. I will never again be at my highest weight. How crazy is that??? I think maybe I check the scale each morning just to reassure myself that this wasn't all a dream. lol

I don't think I look like I've lost 60lbs. I definitely don't think I look the same as I did the last time I was this weight, ages ago. I guess time and pregnancy will do that to ya.

My favorite go-to pair of jeans finally got too baggy. I was told twice over Christmas week that they looked horrible on me and I was tired of hearing loose fabric swish when I walked, so I went shopping. Keep in mind that I was actually stressing the zipper on these jeans pre-op. I would sit down and the zipper would pop open. For them to be too baggy to wear was kinda inconceivable. The old jeans were a size 24. Wanted to just pick up a pair of cheapy jeans to get me through so I tried a bunch on at Target. I took a couple different sizes into the dressing room. They were all too big. I had to go back out to the rack and pick up a size I was actually afraid to try on! They just looked too small on the hanger. But low and behold, the size 18s fit! Well, I should qualify that by saying they're stretch denim and the fit in the thighs is tighter than I would normally buy--but I promised myself I would buy something that was a tad snug so that I'd get more wear from them as I continue to lose. They totally fit in the waist and the zipper, I can breathe in them comfortably even when sitting. Woohoo! I left the store clutching the size 18s and mumbling to myself from the shock of it all. 

Otherwise, there's not much to report. A boring DS recovery here. Still dragging as far as energy levels, but they have been steadily improving. I'm trying to be patient with myself about that. I feel so "normal" otherwise, it's hard to remember that my body is dealing with a lot as a post-op with significant calorie restriction and rapid weight loss. I've been way irritable too. I know it comes with the territory and it will pass eventually so I'm just riding that out now.

It's an exciting time in my DS bubble here, my mom is having her DS surgery on January 14th and my hubby is having his on January 18th. We're still not 100% sure how we're going to cover child care for my work schedule since they're both going to be out of commission at the same time and my sister starts back to college the same week. I can't take any more time off because I'm a part-timer and I took 4 weeks unpaid for surgery/other health issues in October/November. I think my MIL is coming up for a few days, but we were trying to get at least two weeks covered so no fresh post-ops have to lift babies in the first two weeks. I dunno, guess we'll figure out something along the way.

Here's a little Christmas photo comparison that I'd like to inflict on you:

Last year, Christmas 2008, not at my highest weight, I'm holding Conner and Ed is holding Alexander:


This year, Christmas 2009, not at my lowest weight...yet ;), think the biggest change was in the babies though! I'm holding Xander and Ed is holding Conner.

I had my official one-month follow-up appt with Abington today. According to their goal weight for me (which is about 20lbs lower than my goal) I've lost 21% of my EBW in the one month. Going by my home scale to my personal goal weight, I'm at 30% EWL. My high blood pressure is "resolved"! I've been off blood pressure medications for two weeks and my reading in the office today was 124/61. I've NEVER had that low of a number unmedicated since, um, childhood. That's just astounding to me. Dr. G actually gave me a high five. Also, the hubby (who is a sleep tech) says he no longer hears me snoring despite purposely listening for it (he's awake nights, usually watches tv next to me while I sleep in bed).

I gave them the list of exactly what vitamins and what doses I am taking every day. Y'all might remember from an earlier post that I was a bit nervous that I'd hear some garbage about "fatal" dosing. I was waiting for either the nurse practitioner or the doctor to lecture me. I got nothing. They just typed my list into their little computer and actually commended my diligent vitamin habit! Not even a hint of anything negative to say. I'm guessing that a few other people from here have broken down their resistance on the vitamin front.

I've been experiencing no reflux, no nausea, no food intolerances. Dr. G asked about any bowel issues/frequency problems, so I gave him a brief overview and commented that my bowel situation is actually better than as a pre-op (better regularity, easier to go, less diarrhea than pre-op, so forth). He was very pleased. He happily stated, "Well, you're having no side effects!" Then he looked at my chart, looked at me, and said he'd see me in two months (for the 3 month followup). So I got my proverbial gold star of health and went on my merry way. Oh, but Donna did call me a poster child DSer. That was kinda cool.....If only they had known that I totally ditched their food progression. Shhhhhh....

It was all going so nicely....Lovely day with family and friends, celebrating the baptism of my niece & nephew (DH's sister's babies). There was yummy food. My tummy was happy. However, there wasn't much to drink that was Baby-DS friendly, so I was working away at a bottle of water.

Now, generally I don't have trouble with plain water. But occasionally, if it's cold and I've sipped a lot in a short period of time, it can feel a bit like a rock sitting in my stomach. At this particular moment though, I wasn't feeling that rock-like sensation. I kicked back my set of vites, 3 big swallows of pills and more water. I was so cool, I sooooo had this DS and pill-popping thing down.

But ohhhh, that last swallow didn't sit so well. The vites were sitting on top of that rock of water. Suddenly, my mouth was full of warm saliva. Bad sign. I waited a moment for it to pass. It did not. I had visions of losing it in the middle of the room in front of everyone, so I bee-lined for the bathroom. And yup, within two seconds. I just brought up water and pills. So sad, what a waste of vitamins.

On the bright side, this is the only time I've puked as a post-op. Thankfully, nothing about it hurt. It was actually LESS unpleasant than vomiting as a pre-op. Like less guttural stomach spasms. How odd yet logical. Anyway, that was it, I returned to the party and no one was any the wiser. I was sad to have broken my non-vomiting streak, but at least I knew immediately what my mistake was and it's something easily avoidable in the future.

Moral of the day: Sarah should not guzzle water like a desert-weary camel and then attempt to chug 12 pills. Lesson over. ;)

Ok, well my actually one month surgiversary isn't until Friday, but I work and have Christmas decorating to do with the DH the next few nights so I'm going to report in early. Hope y'all don't mind.

My life as a one-month post-op is already better than I anticipated. I guess I'll start with the "challenging" things first:

TMI: I haven't had major bathroom issues, but I have had lots of "loose-ness." Nothing scary or uncontrollable, or even as bad as I anticipated, but things have definitely been "puddingy." There are days when I have no movement at all. It's actually pretty similar to how I was as a pre-op, except I had MORE diarrhea as a pre-op than now. I assume all of this to be relatively normal bowel behavior in the early post-op weeks, so I have no trepidation about post-op bathroom life in the future. I believe taking a probiotic and the iron supplements have helped firm things up tremendously. I went without the probiotic for a few days and definitely noticed a difference. I'm paranoid about the smell. It's definitely different. Not necessarily worse, just different and unfamiliar. Hubby claims it's peeling layers of skin off the inside of his nose. I suspect he's being overly dramatic. I do keep a mini bottle of Ozium in my pocket when I'm at work for the bathroom there, just to be safe. I have not needed to avail myself of a public restroom yet and we've spent a lot of time in stores and/or restaurants, so no dire urgency issues.

Ummmmmmm...other challenges....not doing housework and not picking up babies sucks. I broke down and cleaned the bathroom tonight because DH apparently hasn't heard of Scrubbing Bubbles. I just couldn't take it anymore. This is a sign that my energy is coming back, because in previous weeks I was just too exhausted to care. This week I was like, "OMG, everything I touch is disgusting." Otherwise I'm trying really really hard to be careful about hernias. Promise. 

Food: I like it. I've liked all of it that I've tried so far. I've had a handful of "one bite too many" instances, because my brain hasn't necessarily caught up with the fact that I can't clean my plate anymore. The tummy is fine with being full so easily, the brain is still confused. I do get physically hungry. Like, ravenous hungry every 3 hours or so. Then almost as soon as I start eating, I'm full. Here is why my cat is loving my DS: she is getting so many meat & cheese leftovers, she's in feline heaven! I end up feeding a lot of my leftovers to the babies (17 months) too. Now the three of them--two human babies and one furbaby--cluster around me like seagulls whenever they see me with food. The three of them eat more of my food than I do! lol

Ok, small wows....
* I can feel a difference in my chin/neck when I look down. I no longer feel like my boobs/neck/chin are smushing together and choking me when looking down. The weight on my chest is lighter and it's definitely easier to breathe overall. Yes, this means my breasts are getting smaller too, but I'm totally ok with that (for now anyway ).

* I'm down to the weight I was a few months after delivering my babies. This is significant because I had lost weight due to morning sickness during the pregnancy, and then after I delivered I pumped for 12 weeks. Also, the first three months of their lives I was practically starving because of the demands of caring for them combined with the calorie depletion of milk production. Family was telling me how great I looked, and I felt good about looking good (otherwise I felt like crap because I had no energy and NO sleep) . But then of course, I stopped milking and started eating and ballooned quickly up to a higher weight than even during the pregnancy. Prior to that isolated dip post-partum, I have not been this weight in about 5 years. So hell, that's pretty exciting!

Otherwise, I'm doing great of fluids and vites. I've been taking my full vite schedule for over 2 weeks now, no issues with swallowing pills. I have one protein shake without fail every morning. For a while I was doing 2 but then I got away from it, so I should aim for 2 shakes a day again (I find them very filling later in the day). I haven't started counting protein yet. I know I should. I'll do better. I know I'm hitting over 50g a day between my shake & protein bar, plus food, so I think I'm ok for one month out. Carbs are more of a struggle than I hoped, but I think I've developed a plan of attack that works for me and that I can live with.

And now for some pics:

We took the lil guys for pics with Santa. This is the most realistic Santa I have EVER seen. I swear, I wanted to tug his beard! If there is a real Santa, this is him, and he's at the King of Prussia mall. ;) Bonus, I was able to walk around the mall for a few hours and didn't feel too tired until we made it back to the car.


Pre-Op, at my highest weight when I decided to pursue WLS:


At just under three weeks out, I've lost more since this picture but it's the most recent I have.

I am two weeks out today. Yay for me! I also returned to work today. But one thing at a time:

I write this section for the pre-ops because I know I voraciously read others' post-op accounts. The last two weeks have been embarrassingly easy for me. Trust me, I'm counting my lucky stars! In many ways I can't believe it's only been two weeks, because it just feels so natural to have had the DS now.

The first week following surgery one incision site was significantly sore. I say this in relation to the other sites that I didn't even feel and look like little pink scratches now. Seriously, I've had cat scratches that looked worse for longer. My surgery was lap, so I woke up with 5 incisions plus one drain site--the drain was removed before I left the hospital--leaving me with a total of 6 "holes." The one above my belly button was the only bothersome one. I figured this was because they did the most work through that site, what with removing my excess stomach and appendix. I'm sure there was a fair amount of tugging and angling going on through that spot. According to my operative report that site was slightly larger than the others. It was pain but not bad enough to take medication for and it became more of an annoyance than anything else. It lasted almost the entire two weeks, but then magically on this past Sunday it just stopped. I woke up in the morning and the pain was gone. I wore jeans to work today (what can I say, my job is low key) without any problem.

My new tummy has been very cooperative. Nothing seems to bother it. I'm doing really well on getting my liquids and basic vitamins in (working my way up to a full schedule). I'm swallowing several whole pills a time without issue. I can drink all temperature beverages and even plain water. I've been drinking at least two protein drinks a day. My food quantities are very small. I am never able to finish the amount of food I prepare for myself. It's funny, I use small dishes and still make too much. I was starving and miserable on my surgeon's food plan (which had a full week of liquid then 3 weeks of purees). Since I do not have a Valtec ring, I very carefully started testing the waters of soft foods at about one week out. Lunch meat roll ups and squares of cheese make me ridiculously happy. I watched others eat their lunches at work today and couldn't fathom how they were able to eat in such quantity. I caught myself thinking this and had to laugh. I know my quantities will increase as I get further out from surgery, but it doesn't bother me to be eating less. I eat a few bites and feel full, then I get hungry again in a few hours so I eat a bit more. I listen to my tummy. I can't ignore feeling hungry like I used to. If I ignore it, I end up feeling foggy and queasy. As soon as I feel hungry, I take it as a cue to eat something small and I continue to feel well.

I have been more tired than normal. I felt exhausted after just getting showered/dressed/lunch for work today. That being said, I found it surprisingly easy to drive to work, do my desk job, and come home. I will admit I put the babies (17 months) to bed a half hour earlier than normal tonight because I was drained. Selfish Mommy. Hopefully they won't remember this travesty for future therapy. ;)

Mini-wows:
* I can see a difference in my face already. I can see more definition in my cheeks. My hubby and mother swear they can too. They promise they're not just saying it.

* Because I refused to buy new bras with my most recent weight surge, I had gotten a few of those bra extenders. I had been using it on the 3rd set of hooks. When I went to put a bra on for work today, I was surprised to be able to easily move past the 2nd, and then the 1st set of hooks and was shocked to find that I didn't need the extender AT ALL! In case I doubted whether there really was a change, a certain gentleman friend at work with whom I'm comfortable was VERY disappointed to see me today. He says my boobs are smaller. He's devastated. (Ya know, after he was happy I survived surgery and all...)

Things I've observed with returning to work:
* People who knew truthfully why I was out the last two weeks stared very intently at me for the first few minutes of the day. I know they were trying to figure out whether they could see any differences. I wasn't offended by it, but I could see where that sort of thing would easily grow old.

* I work in a medical environment, so I was able to use the big old style doctor's scale with the weights and all. While I knew I had lost a certain amount since surgery, it felt so different to get on the scale and have to physically move the weight blocks down from their typical positions. Suddenly the amount of weight I've lost in these two weeks felt MUCH more significant! It felt...real. My digital scale at home just isn't as much fun. I think I might choose to weigh myself weekly at work. (I must confess, I've been scale obsessed at home.)

Ok, I think that's about it. Sorry this became so long. Anyway, so far I'm nothing but happy with my DS! I'm looking forward to a long life of being a boring, skinny DSer.

I had my surgery this morning. God bless wireless internet in the hospital! Everything went smoothly. I think I was in surgery for 5 hours. I'm in my own room now. My pain is well controlled. I'm thirsty as all get out--these sponge swab things just aren't cutting it. lol But otherwise I'm doing really well! Thank you for all the swinging critters! They aren't going to let me walk or drink until the morning, so I have nothing better to do than surf the internet from my mostly reclined pose.

My surgery is bright and early tomorrow morning, scheduled for 7:30am.

I plan to post an update on how everything went when I get home (hopefully sometime over the weekend). My closet is organized, my vitamin tray is pre-filled, my kitchen is stocked with soup, jello, popsicles, and protein samples, there is a full jug of water on the watercooler, the bathroom is clean, and my hospital bag is packed.  Sooooooooooooo.......what do I do now? lol

I am looking forward to having the sugery behind me and starting the healing process. I can't wait to see what this next year brings. Maybe I'll actually go swimming in the summer of 2010!

Also, a quick thank you to all the wise vets who stick around to provide all us newbies with much needed guidance, advice, and support. I recommend this message board to all my friends and family who express interest in the DS. Because of this board, I feel like I have a game plan in place for many of the common fresh post-op struggles I may face (even if that game plan comes down to "ask the board"). This board helps to fill in many of the day-to-day-life gaps that so many bariatric centers don't discuss.

Thank you!!!!!!!!