stephanie2011

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My surgery was 8 months ago and it feels like a lifetime already.  My current weight is 165 although it has gone as low as 163.  I am wearing a size 12 pants and a large/med top.  I was just fitted for new bras on the weekend (finally) and they came in at a 36 D although I had to laugh at the D - really???  It must be the extra skin :)  I haven't done body measurements yet but will probably do them when it has been a year. 

I am so happy that I had this surgery and my life is so different in so many ways now.  The best thing is the amount of energy that I have.  My 5 yr old, Connor, keeps wanting me to race him everywhere and I do.  We race to the store, we race down the hotel corridor to the elevator, we race all the time.  He loves that mommy can race him and I love the fact that I can run full out and be able to still breathe.  My husband is happy with the new me although I give him a hard time with his eating habits now.  He doesn't eat very well - skips meals and he has gained weight since I lost.  I want him to also be healthier so that is a work in progress.  He has to want it for himself but hopefully seeing how much this has changed my life will motivate him to also make changes. 

People were concerned for me that I wouldn't be able to eat 'normally' afterwards and that is so not true.  I eat completely normally, for a healthy person who doesn't live on junk food.  I eat meats, veges, fruit, milk, cheeses and some starches in small quantities. I currently eat between 1000 and 1200 calories a day.  I also indulge in chocolate when I crave it but I only have a couple of pieces instead of a whole chocolate bar.  I don't crave cookies but do have some salty treats such as popcorn or crackers.  I am comfortable with my current eating habits but am also vigilant to ensure that the grazing dosn't start up.  This came up recently when I had some black licorice given to me and then I bought a package.  This is a slippery slope and is totally okay as a treat but not every day or even most days. 

I don't really excercise.  I said it out loud.  People who don't know about the surgery think that I am training with a trainer or that I work out regularily - I don't.  I do walk but not regularly.  I take the stairs at work and run around with my kids and walk when possible, park farther from the entrance etc but don't 'excercise'.  Recently, I did start to walk on a treadmill and will be using that more often until the warm weather.  Ideally, I would like to join a yoga class but it is expensive so I keep putting it off.  This is the area that I am currently working on - getting more exercise to kick start my weight loss.  This becomes very important as the weight loss slows down - which it has.  I am okay with that pace.  slow and steady wins the race in my opinion. 

Struggles - not so much.  I feel very fortunate not to have had any complications as of yet.  Most foods agree with me so that is another bonus.  I do not binge eat or starve myself.   My issues was just the sheer quantity of food that I was eating before, even when I thought I wasn't eating too much.  You just don't realize how much you eat until you write it all down.  It is staggering.  That was me - eating alot all the time.  My struggles are not with food but with my new found freedom and self awareness.  I find that I do look for attention, especially from men.  I love feeling sexy and the feeling of being admired by others.  It is a heady feeling and so new to me.  For example, I was away at a hockey tournament this weekend and one of the dads said that I was the hottest hockey mom they have ever had.  Surprising how much that inflated my ego.  who, me?  really?  My husband was also there and was considered a 'lucky guy'.  LOL. 

This is still the honeymoon period of this journey so it will be very interesting to see how it progresses. 

Steph

We just had a fantastic long weekend with and without the boys.  The first part was without as they were up north and my brother and SIL came over for a BBQ.  This was the first time they saw me since my surgery and they were surprised at how good I looked and felt.  My mother had this surgery 3 years ago and her recovery was very different.  She was exhausted for a long time afterwards and didn't seem to feel well a lot.  I FEEL GREAT!!
On Monday, we took the kids to Marine Land and walked, and walked, and walked for 4 hours.  I brought my food and felt really good and had no problems walking.  I had a bit of an episode on the drive there because I didn't have my breakfast and we made the decision to leave at the last minute so was rushing around gathering everything.  I had my oatmeal in the car and it took me over an hour.  It was so painful in my chest and my back and it took about a half hour or so to pass.  I didn't sweat but I felt SICK!!  That was the first time since the surgery that I didn't feel good.  Hot on its heels, I feel really tired today and am trying to get protien in to boost my energy.  we'll see how that goes.
I am on the full fluid diet but I needed something more than soup so I scrambled an egg with cheese and that seems to have satisfied the pouch.  Hopefully it will help me with my energy today too. 
My weight has not budged since last week.  Apparently these stalls are normal but of course, I think to myself, maybe it won't work for me.  Am I eating too much?  argh.  I will soldier on and up my protien and see if that helps.  I actually think I am not eating enough because I am sick of yogourt right now and havn't really replaced it with much other than extra soup.  
thats is for now.  I think I will start blogging to keep track of my progress and to not forget the trials that happen during this journey.
Starting weight 256, todays weight 230.