Being a bit anti-social is okay right now

Oct 21, 2012

Day 6 of Optifast - almost a week done!  Hard to believe.  Only two weeks to go after tomorrow!

I was just thinking while reading threads on OH today that my coping mechanisms during the optifast stage could be considered to be a bit antisocial.  I can't see myself eating lunch with people at work over the next couple of weeks because it will be unbearable to watch them eat delicious food.  I'm not going to go out with people to places where I think there is going to be food to tempt me or where I can't control the food environment, or where I might be late for my next optifast shake.

One of my husband's friends occasionally drops in during the evening, and stays until the wee hours.  Eventually, we end up ordering in food.  I've told my husband that if he drops in during these next few weeks, they can't order in pizza or other fast food - they will have to go out and eat it elsewhere.  My husband agrees completely.  (And of course, I won't be accompanying them!)

Yesterday, I cooked brunch for my husband after he was out doing yard work all morning.  It was my way of showing appreciation, especially at a time when the last thing he expected was for me to cook anything for him, and I felt strong enough to do it - it was a spur of the moment thing.  But I couldn't sit with him at the table while he ate it.  I tried to sit with him with my optifast shake, but I just couldn't bear watching him eat those delicious eggs and ham.  So I moved to the living room (we have a small place, so the living room is right next to the dining room) and we chatted across the rooms instead of across the table.  He understood completely.

I know that eventually I'm going to have to learn how to handle food temptation, and learn how to eat my way in a world that eats in a completely different way.  But optifast is such an artificial diet that I know I just can't do it right now.  Once I can eat real food (even the liquid diet looks amazingly good right now, and then I'll be able to have nice soups at least), then I can start learning how to eat my stuff with other people eating their stuff.  Luckily, I'll be off work during the liquid, puree, and part of the soft food stage...

So I'll be social in other ways.  I'll spend breaks with friends from work, sipping tea or broth while they have coffee or tea.  I'll go for walks with my husband instead of sitting at the table with him during meals.  And maybe it's not so bad to stick closer to home on the weekends instead of going out and taking the chance of putting myself in a situation where I can't control myself or the food around me.  It's only for another couple of weeks (or so).

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