Tell me what you think...

I'm scheduled for Roux en y gastric bypass on 12/4.   How do you guys feel about telling people about the surgery?  I, kind of, just want to get it out there, make a Facebook post and be done with it.  That way people know what's going on and maybe I won't have to answer every little question. 

 I don't want anyone to know really but they will guess it soon enough.  I do not want to discuss it especially with my MIL who is known for being unsupportive.  I do not want to answer questions.  I feel very vulnerable and not up for being judged about not doing it the regular way.

I have about 100 to lose.  My doc initially told me I was too skinny for surgery.  I had to remind him I have every complication including diabetes and my bmi is 40 on a bad day.

I have about the same amount to lose and risk factors.  I work with a large group of women and I've heard them whispering behind people's backs when they "think" they've had something done.  I think I'd just rather they know.  My family is very supportive so I'm not to worried about them. 

My position was, I can always tell, but I can ever 'Un-tell'

I told my husband and one trusted friend.
I told family and friends after my surgery was over.

I did not want people's opinions, or their horror stories about their cousin's sister's best friends' mother who had surgery and died or gained all their weight back.

Yeah or the "so and so was on purred food for a year cause of all the complications." Oh really? Cool,  thanks for the positive reinforcement. 

I think you should tell who are close to you and that are supportive.Negativity is not a good thing.I haven't even told my parents. None of my family know either.Just makes life easier. Once you put it out on Facebook it's out there and there is no taking it back.I just decided to tell people that I am taking care of myself.Which isn't a lie.I am taking care of myself.

I told everyone. I am the kind of person who is straight up with everyone. One if the kindest remarks I got was from one if my students who said, "Mrs. B, you don't need that!" One if the rudest was from my mother-in-law who although she meant well (she has known a couple of people who had complications) hurt my feelings with her subtle remarks, "You're not going to do it are you?" On the day if surgery I posted a pic of me in the preop room. I knew this would elicit questions because I did not announce it earlier. I was honest and received very positive feedback. As I have only begun my journey (1 month today), I am sure there will be more, but I am a strong person and know that I did this for the right reasons. Good luck to you!

This is a very common question. I posted the same one a few weeks ago. I don't know if I have good advice or not. I had a RNY 2 days ago. I was very private with my decision. I chose to tell the safe  people in  my life. My husband, children, sister,2 closest friends, and my manager (due to asking off some time). I will be off work at least 4 weeks (maybe more)there should be a noticeable difference by then. I wont lie if asked. I just don't think I will announce it. I needed positive people preop and immediate post op. As said by others, I don't need any food police. I have had those most of my life. Only you know who in your life is safe. I chose to put  walls up around those who aren't positive. I don't need negative energy now. I personally didn't put anything about it on fb. I don't need people evaluating me just looking for me to fall. I have experienced that for way to long. It did mean that I retreated a little preop but the time alone was great time for reflection.

Good luck. 

 

I told everyone.  I am not ashamed of my decision.  I did what is best for me.  I had one person say something negative, we talked, and she is very positive with me now.  I don't go a day at work without someone saying something, looking good, keep working it, one co-worker calls me Lilly Tomlin "incredible shrinking woman".  You also have to have the attitude to ignore negativity and keep it positive.  I also had someone mention the mothers best friends daughters coworker regained, I said Oh she stopped using her tool, so sad for her.

 

    I am usually a very sensitive person but with this my skin has been pretty thick. I have told all my family and friends about my upcoming surgery. Do you know the people who have actually had the weirdest comments have been front office employees or techs at medical places I've gone to for various testing for this. They are always the ones making the comments like, "Oh, so and so knows so and so who died." Or, here was the latest one ,"Giiiiiiiiiiirrrrrllll, what you  gonna do bout all that loose skin?" Even still, I just kind of laughed and nodded my head and it didn't bother me. I figured, hopefully they will see a success story and then I can be the thing they talk about to the next patient or person. And maybe that will be an inspiration to someone else.  Helping someone else is really important to me. Someone I don't know or may never know. If I can be the "so and so" of a positive story, then telling people would be all worth it.  Also, people look at me and see a 300+ pound woman, that is more embarrassing to me than doing something about it.