To tell or not to tell?

I need a support system, so I told my family, friends and co-workers,so I shared my journey with them, and they supported me all the way from pre-op to post-op.
The liquid diet is no big deal, my surgeon said to follow it as closely as I could.

Yes, I told the people at work. It is small office and besides, people talk too much! That and the fact that we are pretty close net so I knew they would support me and I have really enjoyed their kind words and concern.


I went back to work 2 weeks and a few days later. I had no complications and there was mild soreness when I returned. There was no problem getting my liquid or regimen in. I just simply kept things in the fridge or at my desk and took mini breaks to heat things up, get more water, ice, tea, etc. Everyone was really supportive and wondered if there was anything they could do or get for me.

I have a desk job so there wasn't a lot of physical labor or anything. As far as my weight loss, everyone could tell! Some just saw it in my face but the majority saw it all over! Now, 1 month and 1 week later, it is so obvious! My pants are like MC Hammar and my shirts are 2 or 3 times too big!

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my sleeve!!!!

I told one co-worker, plus I work with my gf, so two know at work.  No one noticed any weight loss when I returned from surgery.

However, anyone with whom you share a meal will notice you are not eating very much.  Unless they're idiots.  And it's not just "I'm cutting back" little. 

In my experience, people who see you every day do not notice as much as you lose weight, but it will be more noticeable to people you see infrequently (like colleagues from other offices).  I don't like it when people make a fuss over it, but I can't control that so I'm just feeling my way through, day by day.

 I am getting the sleeve in 10 days & I work in the Human Health Services!  With lots of employees!  I have been pretty open but also when something big is on my mind it is hard for me to keep quiet! lol!!  I have had a lot of nice comments & concern & a lady that got WLS done a long time ago that has had problems ... she talks poorly bout it tho!  The lady in the office always says i'm already melting away & has showed concern that did make me feel put on the spot!!(to make sure i'm doing it for the right reasons)  It is a PERSONAL decision but could I have done with out that "put on the spot" ..... yes but it is still part of my growth!  I really need to learn to just speak my mind which I will love to be able to do!!  
Anyways it is your decision!  No one way is the right way!!! 

I did tell the people that I work with, all 63 of them. Our work family is close and I felt alright doing so. And I'm thankful that I did for the simple fact that I had an incredible support system through them. Every step of the way they were there cheering me on (even if they didn't think I should have surgery, cause you'll get those) and everyone was supportive dispite their own feelings on surgery. Partly due to the fact that I didn't make it a discussion, I explained what I was doing and why and if they had questions I'd answer but it was not open for debate and I made that pretty clear.

Liquid diet was interesting. I was constantly peeing (get ready for that, lol) and almost always had something to drink in my hand. People I work with found it all really interesting and would ask lots of questions.

I took 2 1/2 weeks from work because I have a fairly physical job. And even though all of them knew, when I came back everyone said they saw a difference.

And I agree with an above poster, it's completely your choice whether you want to tell coworkers or not. I'm a super open person and felt like hiding what I did was silly. I have no shame to my game and everyone would have figured out what was up eventually. But again, do what is best for you and what you're comfortable with.

Here's my take on this...

I did not tell a lot of people before surgery -- just my boss, one co-worker who had WLS recently, and one co-worker who happened to be working on the unit where I had to attend my pre-op class.  I wasn't ashamed of having surgery, but I didn't want to hear everyone's WLS horror stories.

Once I returned from surgery, I've told everyone who has asked.  I feel like surgery is a part of who I am now.  I am different than I was before in a lot of ways.  I don't think it is healthy to hide who you are or be ashamed of having surgery. 

I am truly thrilled at the amount of support I've received from my co-workers post-op.  Work has actally been amazing since I came back.  I'm a supervisor, and my staff really missed me while I was gone and they are really into my weight loss and ask me a lot of questions and provide me with a lot of support.  If you choose not to tell people, you will prevent those around you from sharing the positive aspects of your journey and providing you with support and encouragement.

Also, I am not a liar.  I am well-respected by my staff, my peers and upper management.  I conduct myself with integrity in all aspects of my life.  Eventually, someone would find out that I was lying and that would erode my integrity.  Do you value the truth from others?  What do you think of liars?  It's much easier to tell the truth up front than try to keep your story straight and remember who you've told and who you haven't.

One last thing that really bothers me -- when people say that they tell others that they are losing weight by "eating less and exercising more" really bothers me.  I don't believe that this is even a partial truth -- if you could lose weight by "eating less and exercising more," why did you have WLS?  That's an insult to the other overweight people out there who are trying so hard to lose weight that way and failing.  It's a lie.

Why not share your story and possibly help others?  So far, two people have heard my story and attended a WLS seminar and are planning to have surgery.  That makes me feel good.

So, that's my take.  It's all food for thought.

I did not tell anyone at work, neither did I share my surgery with aquaintances. I had a previous quite serious surgery, and the questions from people I barely knew were invasive, and inappropriate. I chose NOT to put myself through that again.

My surgeon's letter to HR was on his surgical letterhead, it mentioned nothing about wls, just a "medically necessary proceedure with a recovery time of 4 to 6 weeks." When people started commenting on my weight loss, I just told them the partial truth " How funny that you notice now, I lost over 30 pounds BEFORE I ever went out on leave, but since you haven't seen me, you notice it now !" After that my standard comment was, and still is : "Thank you for noticing, I'm working hard on it." and I compliment THEM on something. People would much rather talk about themselves anyway.....

You guys are great.  Thanks so much for all of your personal stories.  One guy I work with knows I've been thinking about it.  I've only been at my job (a temp job) since Aug 1, 2011, so  I'm not entirely sure I know who I can fully trust and who not to.  But like many of you have mentioned, the people I work with LOVE to gossip.  So it would be hard to keep it a secret from some and not from others...unless I felt like I knew who I could 100% trust.

Not sure what  I'll do when the time comes, but its really nice to hear both sides.

Thanks a ton!

My idea was just to tell a few ppl in my Dept. I'm a private person by nature and felt that I didn't want to share. The flip side is that I've had an attitude cultivated during my Punk youth that I pretty much don't give an "F" what ppl think about me. Living in an outrageous sub-culture in teens and twentys tends to do that ;-)

Unfortuantely, my boss didn't respect my desire to keep this quiet and now more ppl know than I would like. I've been ambushed by coworkers than now know. So far no one has been negative, just curious. I'm sure I'll get more questions when I return to work a week from tomorrow after my surgery leave.

So that's where I'm at. F'em if they can't take it. I made the decision that was best for me, my family and actually one that will make me a better and more productive employee.