Ponderings by a Food Addict 10 months post-op

I am almost 10 months post-op and close to goal weight (3 lbs. from my original goal weight and 18 lbs from my new goal weight).  I find that I am eating a bit more (this is planned for) from time to time to keep my body 'grinding' as I call it...when I say a bit more I mean 100 to 200 extra calories (they are protein healthy based and typically around that TOM).  My body just wants more at that time and I allow it this extra as I want to be respectful of it but under my terms!  My weightloss slows for a week or two (maybe just one lb. a week) and then I continue to lose as I go back below or at the 800 calorie mark (2 to 3 lbs a week).  My body has always worked like this so I knew that going in and have really never hit a plateau.  Things I am noticing about my thought processes: I am becoming more focused on all the times I prove successful in avoiding poor past habits (I do this A LOT on a daily basis and make myself aware of it and acknowledge it to myself so I can feel accomplished), I still need to weigh myself everyday at this point as it makes me feel accomplished too (and I want to be aware of the ebbs and flows of my body when it wants to fluctuate and also, keep the same schedule of when I weigh), I tend to offer to share food items which I never did before and as it's a social grace I feel good about it in two respects- being nice and considerate and knowing that I am exacting control in a more healthy way regarding food portion, and another thing I have noticed is that when I try on clothing now it is an enjoyable experience and makes me way more excited than eating a lot of unhealthy foods and dreading the mirror when trying on clothes in the past.  And yes, as I have felt more confident in my abilities to stay true to my eating plan I know I can eat a bite or at the most two of things that I think I need to taste and it will hit the spot in needing to have the sensory experience without becoming a glutton.  Not everyone can do that and I do know my limits (such as pizza...I have not tried real pizza...I know it would be a disaster).  A real life experience with some of these thoughts occur daily...one today, was saying 'no' to a Twinkie.  I tried one a weekend ago because of not having one in many, many years.  I tasted it and it tasted like burnt cardboard to me...and whereas before, if I had thought that I still would have put it in my mouth because of it's sweetness and novelty...today, I just recalled the taste that I didn't like and began sharing my love for Arctic Zero when I want a cold treat!  So, as I continue to learn things about myself, others, and my stomach I just want to share with anyone else who might have similar experiences and not aware of how much progress you have made...I'm feeling proud myself but always a little apprehensive just like with any addictive process.  Each day is new with it's own unique challenges and I'm only a doughnut or pizza slice away from relapse!

Good Post!

I think this is really cool.  I like that you know your limits and work within them.  I like that because of that you've been able to let go, a little bit, and let life work how it does.  Very cool.

Great post !!!

Your very "aware" and in "touch" with the process and your body !

frisco

I hope to be as strong :) 

I was just about to post the same thing!

Awesome post. ... your so aware!!! :-)

One thing that stood out is that you need to weigh daily at this stage. 

I found out that I need to weigh daily at every stage.  If I slack off on weighing myself, weight can come back very quickly.  I still weigh every day and plan to do that for life.

I totally agree with you. It's my way of holding myself accountable.

Thank you guys for the feedback...as much as I needed to write my thoughts out to absorb a little better it seems as though I needed some feedback (good, neutral, bad...not that any was bad) especially from the vets that I recognize (Frisco).  Also, the weighing daily...yeah, I can't see me NOT needing to do that at any time in my future except maybe when I'm too old to see the numbers from that high (maybe by then they'll have invented replaceable eyeballs...ha!).  Anyway, thanks again you guys! Keep on keeping on...you Losers...ha again!