Looking "too skinny".... SMH

So I just got a text message form my bestie (I uploaded a pic of me relaxing while I did some grilling for my family)... She went on a long text saying she was now extremely worried about my health, that I looked "too skinny" and that I need to stop losing weight.... I had read about that happening to people here and back then I thought... "Sure, like that would ever happen to me." I also remembered that within the conversations something was said that people are just used to seeing you big and when you are getting smaller they freak out and think something's wrong with you and you need to stop. I bluntly told her that I was thankful for her concern but that I had also learned that she was used to seeing me be such a big girl and that now she was just having some issues with that, but that being a size 10 pants does not equal to being "too skinny" and that I am in a healthy weight range (high on the range actually) and that I determine what number on that healthy range I want to be at.

I just had to bent this out, we had been having issues the past year and I'm trying not to snap at her.

I think your response was really good.  I hope she reacts well.  

And I'd also like to offer my sympathies for having a rocky relationship with your bestie right now.  I'm having issues with mine as well and it just sucks.  

She reacted ok... Except she then proceeded to criticize some of my body parts as they are now too "small"... I had to explain it's her brain and that she'll eventually get used to it, that it's a process that we'll go through.

And YES it SUCKS to have a rocky relationship, within the last year she has been so clingy and unsecure, not to mention offensive for no reason. We cleared things up, but she has then proceeded to distance herself from my surgery journey. So when she talks like that, it's hard not so snap. lol Anywho, I hope I set her in the right direction now.

Not to mention your body will sort of find equilibrium with time.  I'm losing my weight from the top down, so I look sort of weird (in my opinion), but I know things will even out once my body has time to adjust after reaching my goal, so it's no big deal that I look a little weird in the meantime!  Or so I tell myself, heh.  

But, you're right.  She's just used to seeing you bigger and she's comparing your new body to your old body and you look teeny!  But, yes, her brain will adjust too, once she gets used to you :D  

My bff has also distanced himself from my surgery and progress, which is just super weird for me since it's pretty out of character for him.  He tells me all the time about his awesome diet and exercise, but he hadn't said a single thing about my progress until yesterday, 9 months and 100 pounds later.  And then it was "glad the surgery is working for you."  Just.. super weird and it makes me snappy and irritated about everything relating to him.  (Sorry to vent on your post.)

Vent away!  I'm on that boat. I'm also losing from the top, which I'm a small going towards extra small (weird)  but my bottom is big lol. I guess we have to also face the possibility of losing relationships, because maybe without us knowing they were/are based on the other person feeling above  you on the looks department and when you start looking better they can't take it.  Sigh 

That's how both my sister and bf have dealt with it.  Now they won't even mention it or comment on anything.  People suck lol.

I too think you had the perfect response! !! Also sorry you have to hear stuff like that !!! I saw your post yesterday and your pics you look phenomenal! !!!! :-) 

♡ Kelly

Thank you KellyJean! I wouldn't have known what to say if not for reading about this around here. 

Your response sounds like an individual who is comfortable with herself and knows the world is used to one thing, and now they just have to get used to the new you.  Sorry your friend isn't more supportive - perhaps they will come around over time? On the plus side, how does it feel to have someone refer to you as "skinny"?   Not sure I've ever heard that word and am looking forward to it!  

Celebrate how far you've come.

I guess there's an NSV there I wasn't counting on, the "skinny" part.... I have to say it feels nice to not be the biggest one in the room, on the other hand it's kind of weird to hear since I know I've lost the weight but I can't see it all the time in the mirror. It's good to hear it from someone else, well except used in an offensive comment.