cherryblossoms
It's nice to feel like you have some control back in your life.
Mar 24, 2011
Your life.
Yea.... it really is. I'm finally feeling like more of myself again after all this trauma of my first few months. Had my kidney/bladder stent taken out on the 16th at the Doc's office, and it wasn't even bad... i didn't cry or anything, and it was out so quick. I felt better immediately.... no pressure on my bladder making me feel like I had to pee constantly and much nicer to sit without the feeling of something rubbing inside.
So, I am out of the woods, and I'm not looking back. No use worrying more.. no more what if's.. and scaring myself. I'm just gonna take care of me NOW as I am and chose to be. Surgery and all. Stressing and worrying does not solve anything, but it does make things worse. I really can't blame myself thou when I was sick, I mean septic shock?, that was scary and life threatening, but I was well taken care of and I am FINE. now
I've been eating waaay better, and it's so weird how things can change because, while I was in the hospital, my surgeon cleared me for regular food~ as tolerated, and I have been eating regular food since. With no problems what so ever. I eat chicken, fish, turkey, beef, shrimp, eggs, veggies, salad, fruit, beans, low fat peanut butter, low fat cheese..... blah blah blah.. and none of it phases me now. I have even made some recipes from a couple of the blogs I learned about on here, and they were delicious, and went down smoothly.
I drink a protein shake every day too. But how weird is that? health and life in general can change so quickly, now sometimes I feel like I never even had surgery. I don't mean becasue I'm overeating, but rather I don't seem to dump..on complex carbs and the sugar in them, I mean I haven't tested it with simple sugar, and don't plan to, but I do ( my choice and NUT recomended) drink 4 ounces of pure sunsweet prune juice diluted with water each morning ( warmed) which has fruit sugar and never have dumped once. It also keeps me regular,, at this point, I do plan to ditch it once I am a bit further out~ as drinking water does too of course. I have daily bm's. I don't have foul smelling gas (so I am told), although I do have gas at times. Sugar alcohols make me feel crappy about 45 minutes after I eat. I do also stick to lower fat cheeses ect because I do think that too much fat has a bad effect on me; althou I haven't had dumping yet.
I have been walking every day , anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes, and have my energy back. I'm taking all my vitamins the way I'm supposed to, so there is nothing more I can get from freaking about that either. I have my 3 month follow up next month.
So, I'm feeling optimistic about my health now. Which is a relief and a welcome change. Now I know why , after re~ reading some old posts ,I wasn't eating and in such a depressed scared place, and it ALL makes sense why I would feel that way at the time And it was okay for me to feel like that. Now, after all this I am feeling like my body and mind, once again has amazing healing capacity and I want to continue to get better. I must a have a very strong inner core and faith. I know I do. ha ha I'm like a dandelion that just keeps popping back up.
I went to Khols and bought a new bra, size 42-C, it's a Bali's " one smooth U " and I really like it, lots of firm lifting support and looks good under t~ shirts. On sale 19.99... wear it on the inner most hook, maybe I should of gotten a size smaller, well it was on sale. As for my other stuff, I have burned Thu 3 sizes all ready, from a 22 jean to a baggy 18 atm. I look like a hobo. I have a closet full of clothes waiting from size 16 to 7 at least to help get me thru. wow... I am excited for the future AND ditching this excess weight AND being healthier because of it.
Been reading the forums on here; don't post much right now. I guess I would just rather read for the time being, but I always do enjoy reading the forums.
