My best buddie asked about my blog, Guess I better update :)

Sep 12, 2012

It has been 16 weeks and 2 days since surgery. Today I stepped on the scale and dropped another 1.5 Lbs. Yeah! Must be my losing week. That's how it works for me. lose for a week-stay the same for two. I do make up for it in inches while I'm not losing though.
 
My highest weight was 297 and today I am 229 that's a total of 68 lbs, Wow. I'm impressed with myself. It's very surreal still. My personal goal is to hit 150Lbs and I am 5 lbs away from the halfway mark to that goal.  I hope to be at the 200 mark by January. We will see how it goes. I sttill struggle with confidence in believing that I can do this, but I am. The head takes a while to catch up for sure.
 
My lifestyle and eating habits are feeling more like myself and not that I'm pretending or on some short lived diet. On days I will be out I make sure I have acceptable protein foods in case there are no choices. I have to be sure and eat every few hours or I will forget and feel bad. I have very little hunger signal.

The urge to stress eat is still there and I accept it, recognize it, and try to learn from it. It's still there and  probably always will be, it's been my way to deal with feelings.
 
I have been having so much fun though. Having a smaller body all of a sudden changes the way you move, basically interact with the world. Here is a list a few things that make me smirk;
1. Every time I put on a shirt I have this habit of stretching out my arms sideways to stretch the shirt so it fits. I don't have to do that anymore but it's a habit and I laugh every time it happens. It's also my (old) way to measure if it will fit so I assume nothing will, in my head. Then I'm surprised when it does.
2. I rode a fair ride with my 11 year old and had complete panic that I would not fit. I did. It was so fun for both of us.
3. I can no longer buy something off the rack without trying it on. My body is changing so fast shopping is challenging because I have to pick several sizes and figure out where I fit in. I tried on several pairs of 16 (normal not women's) jeans the other day and they fit. I was surprised but I'm still convinced Levis must have a generous cut because no way could I wear pants in the non plus section.
4. I don't dread physical "things" anymore because I can actually do them. Like-Exercise, gardening, walking up and down stairs, walking to the mailbox, spending the whole day on my feet (like the fair).  

I am feeling so much better and can't imagine what it will feel like to lose another 79 Lbs to get to 150. I know I have been at these weights in the past, because I had to get here, but I cannot remember ever weighing less in my adult life. I am less hung up on how fast I lose, I don't want to add stress because I think that inhibits loss too. I am excited about the future.  

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